No body understands that I am hurting inside because of people who hate me who I didn't even do anything to. Let me start from the beginning, last year I came to this new school and I was pretty psyched because it was my first public school. Well I started off with a lot of friends but then these two girls started messing with me and my dad found ouyt and told the principle and they got in trouble and all of their friends hated me and they hated me even more but it was still kay because I still had my best friend Joey. Well Joey was with me through everything we were so close that people thought we were going out and then me and my best friend Ana got into this fight well Joey was with me through almost the whole thing untill one day he just stopped being my friend for no reason. We stopped talking and we never made up because I got in a fight with this girl and got suspended. Well this continued into this year and now I'm really starting to feel all of the pain and emotion. I'm going through so much and I wish he was here to help me dea with all of it, last year when I was going through hard times and issues with cuttin he was there for me and that made it easier. I don't have any friends that are as close as me and him were and that hurts. I tried to talk to ne of my close friends Kaitlin about it but she just says 'Forget it, stop obsessing he doesn't care about you.' That hurts more because that's what mostly everyone says. I went to see my schools two counselors and even they said that and my parents think I just like him because he's a jok. The worst part is I feel all this pain and pressure to the point where I'm cutting myself and looking for ways to kill myself and he doesnt even care if I was dead or alive. How can someone just do that to someone else and not feel a thing? Can somebody help me before I kill myself? What can I do to make him realize? I already wrote him two letters. I think that he doesn't want to be my friend because he cares too much about what his other twoo friends think.

a friend of mine killed himself right before christmas and trust me its not worth it you leave behind so many people who love you even tho it doesnt seem like it now so many poeple love you they really do... dont do it honestly its not worth all the pain thats comes after for everyone

Some say that the purpose of having people in your life is to learn from them. They come and they go.

If you've already expressed your feelings about the situation to him in the letters, then just give him some alone time. He's obviously hurt by all this too, since he just keeps avoiding you after being so close. If he values his other friends above a true friend like you seem to have been, then that's his loss.

Going after him again and again when everyone tells you he won't care is just a waste of your time and will only make him less sympathetic to you.

Maybe someday he'll come back to you, but friends don't just ditch friends like that. He may have been great while you were together, but now that he just takes off, there's really nothing you can do to help. Friends stick with each other till the end, not till some people tell them to ditch you or whatever is going on there.

He probably did care about you, but if he decides to get up and leave it is NOT YOUR FAULT. He obviously values fitting in with his buddies more than being a good best friend, and you'll have countless more good friends in your life.

SexyGrl, I know what it is to be depressed and I know what it is to be a cutter and have suicidal thoughts. First of all, let me tell you that this Joey guy, if he cares more about what other people think and this is the reason why he stopped talking to you then he does not deserve your friendship. I know what it is to feel alone, but you are not. You have parents that worry about you. Your father obviously cares a great deal about you if he went to the princple immedeately to tell him about the problems you were having. Though this approach of him caused you trouble, I am sure he did it in the best interest for you. Cutting is not going to get you anywhere, I have been through that and it doesn't do anything but leave painful scars, not only the outter ones that remind you of how bad and ashamed you feel, but also the inward ones that are the worst. You have to put yourself first right now. Stop looking for this friend of yours. If he truly cares, which I hope with all my heart he does, he will look for you. If he doesn't let it go. It will be for your best. Get to know other people, try and get new hobbies and more importantly, know that you are worth love, respect, and time. If he cannot give you this, then his friendship may not be worth it at all. Be strong and I hope you find someone you can truly confide in and someone who is there for you unconditionally. Your life is precious, please don't throw it away.

SexyGrl,

Ok i no what you are going through i went to a school my whole life and went from everyone lovin me to hateing me becuause of some stupid rumors. Well everything will get better just becuase u lost him doesnt mean you cant find someone else i lost the one person i thought i could trust most as a friend and i was wrong but now i have new friends and a new me. Ive been through alot and you just have to think positive and i no ur thinkin ok how do i do that but its possible like find pictures and keep them around you that make u happy pictures that have special feelings with them. Well i hope i could help some and if you have n e questions just e-mail me.


im_your_girl02@yahoo.com

No guy or no person for that matter is worth killing yourself over. Plus this guy is so underserving of you. It sounds like you have other friends. When you think about killing yourself make a list of all the people that would miss you if you did. Hang this list somewhere where you can see it every day and know how much you are loved. Also you might need to see a counselor about this.

nothins worth killing yourself over hun wether he's the greatest guy on earth or not. but I'm not a pro counseler so these folks will help you out you can call'em or chat and they'll talk with you about all your problems okay?

www.teenhopeline.com

just try it what can it hurt?

Wow. No offense, but you're going crazy over someone who is completely undeserving. You sound like a really nice person and you shouldn't let some guy who listens to whatever his friends think about you affect your life. No one is worth killing yourself over, especially someone who hurt you so badly.
I suck at giving advice but I can tell you that this guy is an asshole and getting him back in your life probably wouldn't make it better. You need to work on getting yourself happier. I'm not saying he doesn't care about you (I wouldn't know) but from what you said, no matter how he feels, he doesn't know how to be a good friend and you could be better off without him
Maybe you should try getting some help outside of the school councelors, or joining a club outside of your school. Anything going on now is not worth killing yourself over. Just think, in 10 years you're only going to have vague memmories of this part of your life. Whenever I feel depressed I just try to keep it in perspective. Things won't be this bad forever if you just give them the chance to get better.