I'm happy for her, but now hes ALWAYS around. It seems like the only time we really get to talk is on the phone(when i can get through) or online. I'm trying to be happy for her, buts it hard. Especially when it was just her and me without boyfriends( we HAD both never had one, well not anymore). Its not that im jealous, I just wanna be able to talk to her at school without him always there! What should I do?

Its not normal . its fine in the beggining when its a novelty but you have to set limits . Just coz there's somebody new in your life you cant forget everything old . you can tell your friend frankly what you think . it doesnt make you a jealous person ud expect the same if she made new friends so why should this be any different ?

My friend recently got a boyfriend and now i feel that there isnt a connection between us any more. Is this normal?

I think that any time a boy comes into the picture, things are going to change. This is especially true when neither/none of the friends have had boyfriends before-- the whole experience is so new that it can be really hard to cope sometimes. I think that a lot of the problems surrounding friends who get boyfriends can be solved by each of the friends being understanding and supportive of one another. If a girl A's best friend (girl B) gets a boyfriend for the first time, B is probably really needing A to help her sort through her emotions. Girl A is worried about being neglected. Both girls need to realize that the other needs them, and that they both need to be selfless in order to support one another-- girl A needs to be supportive and happy for girl B, and girl B needs to remember to value the friendship she has with girl A.

I speak from experience-- I have been going out with my boyfriend for 7 months and my friends still have not gotten over it. It is no longer a case of neglect-- i spend as much time as i can with them, and i only see my boyfriend about once a week because he lives far away and goes to a different school than me. I know that my friends felt neglected for a while, and i worked very hard at making them happy, but they have never once said that they are happy for me.

When boys come into the picture, things ARE GOING TO CHANGE, and probably never go back to the way they used to be. BUT this does not have to be a bad thing-- the parties involved need to be understanding of one another, and try to see how the other is feeling. IT CAN BE WORKED OUT, it just takes TIME, PATIENCE, and WORK.

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Originally posted by tenischica101:
I'm happy for her, but now hes ALWAYS around. It seems like the only time we really get to talk is on the phone(when i can get through) or online. I'm trying to be happy for her, buts it hard. Especially when it was just her and me without boyfriends( we HAD both never had one, well not anymore). Its not that im jealous, I just wanna be able to talk to her at school without him always there! What should I do?

One of my friends had the same problem... Just plan some time for you and your friend to get out and have a good time... Just you and her. Go out to the movies or something, or have her over. That way you can talk and keep your friendship strong. Things are bound to change, you just have to accept the changes and adapt to them hope this helps you out

By the way, tenischica, my friend and her bf broke up a few days ago, and now things are back to normal. It turns out he is a complete jerk who ignores her and is completely self-centered. All of her friends are now trying to comfort her for her not-so-unfortunate loss, and we're all happily together again.

My best friend just got a boyfriend. And it's been over a month now and she barely told me yesterday. She lied to me. And not only that, she's been spending more time with him. But the thing is they've known each other since they were in Kindergarten. And it's upsetting. Things wont be the same between me and her but she says nothing changed. A LOT changed.

Well...I'm a little upset. My best friend just became a girlfriend of a boy she's known for a REAAAALY long time. But she spends her time with him and everythings changing and going wrong. I don't know what to do...and she lied to me for a while. She barely told me she was going out with this boy yesterday. And she's been hiding it for a MONTH already.

well, my best friend had this boyfriend and he dumbed her and she came crying to me b\c she like dumped me for him...then after he had his fun he came back to her and she asked me if she should go out with him again and i said sure but you know what happen last time and if it makes you happy sure, so then they were going out for 2 weeks befor i asked her if they were dating again and she said yes, she didnt even tell me, now she doesnt talk 2 me at all and when i try 2 talk to her she looks at me like im not even her friend and shes just so rude to me. shes my best friend and she seems only like this to me, so for the past 3 weeks i just have given her space and she thinks im mad at her b\c i went to a party and she didnt want to go, which i understand why she didnt want to go and i would never be mad at her for that, i tought she new that. so after school all they do is...well you know and i never even see her and well i feel like i dont have a friend at all in her. and the worst thing is that the guy is a horible influance on her hes about to get kicked out for grades and they stay out every night really late and she dosnt care anymore and i have tryed to talk 2 her but, she just gets all pissed off and blows me off...she is like the nicest person 2...its so weird so i just have given her, her space and hope she going to be happy with out me after all this...

talk to her.. if she wont listen...

move on.. find new things to occupy your time.. w8 for her to come TO YOU... wen she have alredy realized how shes been putting you off for this boy..

My best friend is in a similar situation as your friend. Jenna really loves being around her boyfriend, and for about a month she was almost obsessed. She didn't really hang with us friends anymore, but we gave her some space and didn't really tell her much about it. Now her bf isn't as caring and lovey-dovey as he used to be, but they're still together. I think maybe you should give your friend space when she needs it b/c obviously this bf is a big deal for her. And who knows? It could simmer down soon like Jenna's did.

well, they broke up, and i told my friend that I didnt really like him, and that I personally wasnt to devasted by it, and then she got mad at me!!! She says she isnt mad now, but... I think she still is.

My friend got her first bf a few weeks ago. He isnt great material and she hangs out with him alll the time. When they break up, I'm going to tell her how I feel, I dont think its fair to leave your friends for a guy. You can talk to her if you want, just wait for a few weeks. If she is your real friend, she should listen and understand.
-Sunset

When I had my first boyfriend I was young and naive and thought if we spent all kinds of time together and stayed up all night on the phone and ditched my friends to be with him that that meant we had a serious relationship. Well he dumped me, said he needed some space that I was smothering him and I came running back to my friends. So what I'm saying is your friends relationship is new and that the novelty will wear off and if she keeps smothering him he's going to dump her and she'll come running back to you to cry on your shoulder. I've got this one friend who will not do anything without her boyfriend. One day we specifically told her we were going out for a girls night. There were 7 girls so we had to take two cars so I went alone just with her in the car. We drove for 45 minutes to a secluded beach at the lake to suntan and the whole way there she just went on and on about how her boyfriend had talked about how much he wanted to go to the lake and about how sad he would be that he wouldn't get to go. When we got there she kept saying "oh i should go home i bet sams feelings are hurt" so finally i drove her all the way home. We got there and I told him we'd come back because she thought he would feel left out and he said "what? I told you I wanted to stay home tonight to cut the lawn I didn't even want to go to the lake". The worst part is the next day she tried to tell us he secretly cried because we didn't invite him to the lake with us (he's 26 years old). Now we don't invite her to anything because we know what will happen. I wouldn't bother saying anything to your friend just yet or writing her a letter or anything because she'll just think you're jealous or even worse she'll tell her boyfriend all about it. I'd just give it some time and try hanging out with other friends for the time being. If she's any kind of best friend she'll miss you and come looking for you.

tenischica, come on, you seem like a sweet girl, but can you really be so lame as to worry about guys at the moment? i'm 14 years old and i'm not even worried about a getting a boyfriend(although i'd like one)

The REAL problem you're having is your confidence. This has nothing to do with guys. It's just another chapter in how you cope with things. You need more confidence to get on in life. Many guys will go for girls who arent the prettiest but have great confidence. seriously.

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Originally posted by sweetiepie20:
Just go out and find a boyfriend for yourself, if she is to busy for you, become to busy for her.

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I would, but guys dont like me, i have acne, next to all the girls at my school with perfect faces, im nothing special. I dunno what i'd say, i guess i dont really have enough confidence....

Just go out and find a boyfriend for yourself, if she is to busy for you, become to busy for her.

Yeah, I'm going through this right now too...My bestfriend has NEVER had a boyfriend...and now that she has one its like shes obbsessed with him. She seems to never have time for me. But who is she gonna come running to when they break up...Just try and remind your bestfriend...that boys come and go..but friends are forever...

Your friend might have to learn the hard way that guys aren't everything. Her boyfriend can't be her whole world, she needs some friends too. Just talk to her about, maybe organize a girls night or something so you two can spend some time together without the boyfriend.