hello i'm new and I came here because I need some counseling more than anything else. What happened to me might seem very minor to you older, less innocent people who have issues with rape or whatnot, but i'm pretty young and naive so this thing traumatized me a lot. So basically my mom and I were taking my dog on a walk and we were on our way home. My neighbor's dog didn't have a leash and started chasing after my dog. Now my dog is a small pomeranian so it would've been completely killed by my neighbor's slightly larger, but much nastier, pomeranian, so I picked up my dog and waited for my neighbors to pick up their pomeranian. Unfortunately the only ones from that family that came to pick up their dog were small girls, all probably around 10 years old, who were no help and were scared of their own dog as they were afraid of being bitten. Now trust me, this is not the first time this has happened, so my mom was very pissed and my neighbor's attitude wasn't helping. Basically my neighbor tried to push my mother's buttons with stupid talk. My mom would say "you're going to get in trouble" and "you're dog is trying to bite us" while my neighbor would say "what am i doing wrong?"(isn't it illegal not to have a dog on a leash btw) and "how is he trying to bite you?"(while the dog was obviously jumping and snipping at my face) respectively. So after ten minutes of this crap, I'm standing scared straight as this dog has been biting at me while i'm just protecting my dog, and my mother loses her temper. She starts yelling "I'm going to call 911" and "your dog is a terror" while my neighbors are yelling at their dog(as if that was going to do anything). Then finally some other neighbor takes their dog off the ground and I go home. NOW I'M SORRY IF THiS BORING YOU BUT BEAR WITH ME! so all of that would have been completely fine, but what happened next is the reason why i'm here. Minutes later the oldest sister (she's probably 21 or something) of that family comes knocking on our door. Now my mother is fuming with anger at that family and she starts yelling at her. NOW I ADMIT MAYBE MY MOM SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN YELLING...but keep in mind what just happened to us. So my mom yelled in her face "Keep your dog on a leash! I can't be safe on my own property because of your dog!" So then the neighbor was like yelling back "STOP YELLING" (hypocrite eh?). So basically the sister was there because she wanted revenge or something for my mom yelling at her sisters (reasonable yelling imo given the circumstances) while pretending to be trying to reason with my mom. So she brought up that point and said "how old are you? act like an adult? how can you yell at 10 year olds?"(OMG THAT FAMILY IS A BUTTON PRESSING CONUNDRUM). So my mom continued yelling and then things got traumatizing for me. as if insulting my mom's maturity wasn't enough, the neighbor called my mom a f$cking b!tch. I wanted to talk back at her as you know my mom is getting insulted here.......but here's the thing...I was stuck frozen. I felt like such useless crap but I couldn't talk back, I was scared of arguing..I don't know exactly what happened...but now I just feel like a coward. So that neighbor walked of to her house, along the way yelling "you're an immature f4cking b3tch". YAY I'M DONE SORRY IF YOU'RE BORED TO DEATH! Anyway...I guess it felt good to blurt that out...but I came here also for counsel. What would you do in my situation? Would you seek revenge and how? Or how would you reason with this? Also....I just feel crappy knowing I'm a coward who is scared of arguing...help please..

I think taking away the dog might be extreme...instead i wrote a letter. don't read it if you don't care as it's looooooong

Dear Neighbors,
I am the son of the family that you had problems with. Yesterday my mother and I were attacked by your dog for the second time due to him (assumed gender) not having a leash. I will say that not having a leash on the dog is a federal offense in violating the laws that keep order in our society. It can result in the dog being removed should police be involved. However, I am not writing this to talk about legalities. Rather, I am objectively explaining the reasoning behind my mother deserving apologies.
Since courtesy was lack and introductions were not given, I will henceforth refer to the three girls that chased the dog as “Sisters” (regardless of whether they’re sisters) and to the adult sister as “Elder.” The most obvious apology deserved is due to the dog attacking us. My family previously warned Sisters to keep the dog on a leash; however, yesterday we were attacked again. First of all, a dog trying to bite my own dog is no pleasure. It is traumatizing in fear, although you may not think so due to a Pomeranian’s size, with the constant scratching and barking. If you are not considerate of my family’s feelings, at least consider those of my dog. My dog may bark a lot, but behind it all, he is helpless with no defense other than a voice. Needless to say, he was terribly horrified. Elder remarked that your dog does not bite. I say that with the aggression your dog used, the end result had to be a bite, not a whiff. Also, Sisters stated that your dog being able to bite was the reason they could not easily pick it up. Later, Elder came over concerned about Sisters being yelled at. I will say that frankly, if I were Elder and truly cared about Sisters, I would be more concerned about their judgment. They are still in childhood, a vital stage for one to learn right from wrong. Due to many things, I can conclude that this judgment is still developing as Sisters didn’t learn to keep the dog on a leash after the first attack and no apologies were given after either attack. Obvious support for my reasoning was when my mother said, “You’re going to get into trouble” and a Sister replied something along the lines of “How am I doing anything wrong?” From that statement, the girl said that committing a crime and having a dog terrorize a family was not wrong. Hence, it would be appreciated if Sisters understood the crime and realized that it isn’t her/their turn to receive an apology, but her/their turn to give one. If doing it for my family’s sake isn’t enough, then it should be done for her future as crimes without apologies only results in enemies.
A second apology is expected from Elder who invaded my property and pretended to be trying to understand what happened. I can conclude that she was pretending as she: 1. already knew the story from Sisters anyway, 2. had a true agenda of being there for an apology of sorts to Sisters, 3. was not listening to my mother who was in fact giving the story like Elder asked for (Yes, if you yell or whisper a sentence, the context of the sentence is the same. Also, in the future, don’t tell somebody to stop yelling. Not only is it impossible to change emotions that quickly outside of movies, but hormonal imbalances would hypothetically occur. Anger ends only when one cools off.) 4. she already had a biased view of the story, for objectively, we are victims of an attack and thus deserve an apology. However, instead she wanted an apology for my mother’s yelling at Sisters. No apology will go to Sisters as such would be ridiculous. Thinking logically, what would one do if one were a victim of an attack? One would yell for the assaulter to stop the attack (in this case only Sisters can stop the attack), for it to never happen again, and for help (ideally police). Also, ten year olds aren’t that fragile. By that age, I had been scolded by teachers multiple times. Thus, asking my family for an apology for being the victims of a crime is out of question. Interestingly, Elder had the nerve to call my mother immature for yelling. Not only does this show hypocrisy, as Elder later began yelling at what in her eyes, was a “child,” but it also shows flawed logic. If I release a dog to attack my grandparents twice and they begin yelling at me, are they immature? No, everybody’s patience can run out. Also, she accused my mother of insulting Sisters with names when the only insult my mother made was that your dog was a “terror.” If Sisters lied about insults, then judgment must develop. Elder then began some game of insulting my mother’s meager grasp of English, her tertiary language. She then called my mother names like “bitch” and “fucker,” showing further hypocrisy with immaturity in name-calling and an unreasonable tantrum due to things not going her “way.” Being mad over things not going one’s “way” is not an attitude fit for a workplace or any other place.
I ask for sincere apologies to my mother. If you still don’t think you did anything wrong due to bias and believe this letter is condescending trash: don’t apologize. Say sorry only if you truly mean it.
PS. I hope this letter reaches all members of your family in some form.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: GreenMod,

Yeah, what Cap said.


Find out the police non-emercency phone number and give them a call. They would probably be better able to advise you on local dog ordinances and what your options are.


In the meantime, if, God forbid, one of you gets biten by the dog, you do have the right to press civil charges.

I suggest calling the city and have them deal with it. That dog sounds like a safety hazard, and I doubt they (The city people, police, pound, whoever) will wait for somebody to get hurt to get rid of it. There was a dog in my neighborhood who did the same thing; Some people called the city and the dog was removed. Problem solved.