a friend of mine wont stop thinking about suicide. she's already wrote her 'good-bye' letter and it seems as the days go by she gets further away from safety. I've been able to talk her out of it before but its gotten to the point to where even i...her best friend in the entire world...cant even seem to get through. What should i do?

and now i have just read that shes benn sorted out, dont i look quite the idiot

im going through this same situation, one of the best things to do is ask them whats really troubling them, not the whole 'my parents and my boyfriend' thing, but if her parents are having a divorce then it may be that, and when she/he tells you try to do ure bets to council her, its what i did to my mate and it worked. we are now closer then ever

the only thing i can tell you is to keep on trying. dont give up on your friend, ever. thats the worst thing you can do. dont let him/her stop believign that your there - and htat you'll always be there. remind your friend of all the good times, and if things dont change, get more help. notify an adult, a counselor, his/her parents. do something. dont give up. hang in there.

I'm not sure how bad this will come out, but I think that you, yourself, needs some help too. This battle you are fighting is emotional; it's ok to be sad for your friend, but you need to be strong yourself in order to help him. If I were you, I would see if you could talk to someone you trust, a counselor or a teacher maybe. See what they say for you, and more importantly for your friend; keep her from thinking about it though. Keep her talking about things he used to once love, sports maybe. But be string yourself! If you are not stable yourself, there is no way you will ever help him through this! Keep a positive outlook on life in the mean time! The more he sees this, the more he will want to change, hopefully. Hope this helps and didn't come out too harsh!

Your welcome, I'm glad she's admitted to a hospital, that's the best way to go. Hopefully you can update me with maybe what her diagnosis is? Good job, it's a hard thing to do, be proud...she's in good hands now.

Thanks for all the help...she finally listened to me and got atmitted to a hospital although not with out some harm...13 new slits. She had me scared to death but shes getting help now so im happy

Ok idiotgamer420,
I just went through this same situation about 3 months ago, I think my information t you will be valuable. So listen. First of all, any self mutilation or abuse? You need to be nosy check wrists arms legs for self inflicted harm. That's very important. Secondly if you truley believe that its that bad, it's time you not ask people online, that you go with these 2 options. #1 talk to the parents, let them know whats going on, this is their child, they need to know. #2 at the age your at it's hard to do this, but you need to talk her into checking herself into the teen psych ward of any local hospital, they do wonders. This is the option I went with, I talked my dear friend into letting me take her to get checked in. Her family didn't care about her and thought she was just nuts, she cut really bad, were talking a pinch deeper and she would have bled to death in minutes, Ive seen cuts on her arms that you could never imagine in your wildest dreams, to this day i do not know how she survived a couple of them. Anyways, on the way to taking her to get checked in I called her family and told them of what I was doing because she is underage, they met me there. I had to go to the extreme of not just talking to her family but actually saying meet me at the hospital or she will die. At this point on the way there she was scratching a horrible cut she had done the night before (this is one that I wonder how she's alive, the cut was a horrific sight.) And it broke open, blood everywhere in my car down her arm. At ths point she had hit something in her arm and was bleeding perfusely, actually part of her arm now is slightly paralyzed because of what she did, cant really explain. Anywho her parents met me there, they knew then she really truley needed help, I had to go to the extreme to show them that, hopefully you dont. She was admitted for 3 1/2 weeks, diagnosed with bipolar disease, put on medication, counseling, and seeing a phsyciatrist. She came out with a new outlook on life, still struggles, but is 98% cured of her suicidal thoughts. This is what you have to do.
Either this for her/him, is a cry for help, telling you their thinking of suicide because that's unusual, most teenagers who commit suicide do NOT tell anyone, it doesn;t matter if your their best friend, it's an extremely personal thing. The girl I was telling you about was a cutter, I never thought it was so bad, because cutting is not unusual for teens, but I found that day I admitted her, under her bed, a suicide note, and a note to me as well. Telling me that I never knew how many times I saved her life, by simply being there and not knowing i was talking her out of suicide, but by just being there for her i was. But she couldn't do it anymore and rely on me so she was writing me a suicide note, along with another one I found to her mom and dad. This was one of the hardest things I encountered in my life, very emotional, and sickningly(not a word) sad.
You have to take action NOW, otherwise you'll wake up one morning, too late, and blame yourself. If she's/he is talking to you about it, that means in a nut shell she's begging for your help. It's truley up to you, they cannot save themselves, at this point you have the power to save them.
I hope I helped you, I hope you read this soon, and I hope all will be solved and well with your best friend. Goodluck, and she's lucky to have such a concerned friend as yourself.

quote:

does it really matter the reason why they do it?

well, not everybody is the same, but a lot of teens go through the same probelms as other teens. So if we can try to find a reason why most teens try to commit suicide, then we will know how to help others like them in the future.

Get her help and talk it out with her see where the main problem is this is a serious problem that you need to help control.

i feel your pain.... i wish so many kids our age didnt turn to suicide as a method to solve their problems. about a month ago a girl i went to camp with for years killed herself and everyone who had ever known her was devastated. I really hate it when people say that other people just kill themselves for attention. does it really matter the reason why they do it? the fact is that even they do want attention, they are so dpressed that they would actually take theyre own lives for that such craved-for security. some suicides may be fore attention, a a life is still lost and it makes it no less important.

i too hav delt with suicide n realised sumthing 90% of the time it for attention sounds horrible but true they want to e noticed or leave a mark but look if it is u will find out n kno but if u think it isnt just try n make her life better and stick up for her if anyone picks on her sometimes it is better to be depressed with ur friend then not have a friend
but then again it sounds horrible to be depressed and if this persons life is this miserable find out y and help it/her/him

Has she seeked any help before? Is she on any type of anti-depression meds? Sometimes these meds can do the opposite, suggest to her to go see a doctor they can help.

You dont have a choice you know . You just have to keep talking her out of it no matter how long or what it takes . Or you can do it how Oprah says " Tell...tell...tell...until somebody listens."

quote:

How can you fight a battle you can't even see?

Master it.

She'd just blow it off. She knows i care about her she just is having touble coping

Make him see this thread . After reading about what you've done and how you feel..................

I guess my biggest fear is of course he actually commiting suicide becasue I dont knwo how i would take it. Its had seeing someone who has literally saved your life go through this. But still no matter what happens I WILL NOT commit suicide out of sadness. I wouldnt dishonor he death like that.

wow, is it not insane that almost everybody knows someone or are themselves suicidal? that completely sucks. you two seem like pretty close friends so im pretty sure u have a hunch about what she is feeling (maybe not some ppl hide it really well) whether its needing to be wanted, family problems (her parents seem like complete jerks...no offense) or whatever she needs help. she is also extremely lucky she as u as a friend. keep pushing the subject on her parents, teachers, guidance counslors anyone who will listen. If she's come close before, she'll come close again. Something i always did for my friend when she was having some tough times at home and was also suicidal, was showing her life. show her everything she has to live for. whether its a talent that she'll never be able to use again if she dies, or a special person (perhaps you) who she'll never be able to see agian. make her realize that there is soo much good in this world to live for, even if she has to dig to find it. where's the fun in a treasure hunt if there is no hunt?
but hun, no matter what happens, at least she'll know you cared. I really hope things work out.

~*enlighten me for i am starving to know*~

First of all your already helping if you are the only reason she hasnt gone all the way yet .
And yaah you absolutely have to talk to an adult