There is some thing on my mind. I ponder it everyday and most likely will for a long time. And yes, it s a matter of sexuality *rolls eyes* (yeah I know overdone) but I'm in a position that I haven't heard of before so just hear me out.

I know for a fact that I'm entirely attracted to men. IF you were to ever see me around a guy i see as attractive, you'd know for sure. What I wonder is whether or not I like girls. I mean I know a couple girls that I would date. Especially the one I'm dating. I think shes great. Really I do. She can make me smile no matter what and I drive about 300 miles a weekend to see her. But something just doesn't feel right. This weekend for example we were with a bunch of my college friends and there was this really good looking guy and he was wearing my favourite cologne. Now I won't lie, I'm a flirty person, but uh... lets call her sally, is ok with it. But I realize that I really am mostly emotionally drawn to sally. Its not like, lets call the guy Clark who, to be frank, I wouldn't mind shagging. Not that I would while I was in a relationship.

So the point is that I have this girl who I think is amazing, but I mean even she says I'm gay. I know that I like guys, but every now and then there is a girl who captures my heart, but I'm not really that turned on by them.

Am I crazy, confused, bi, gay? Some good advice or just underdstanding would be really great. Thanks.
~Cuervo Quixotic

Yeah that makes sense.... I know I just have to sit back and think it out. (Somewhere between my Research paper for E 110 and everything else.)I also know that I just need to talk with her. Thankfully shes gone through this before (yeah shes bi) so I reckon she'll be understanding and help me through it and listen.

Thanks guys, it really helps just to hear other people's thoughts. I guess it makes me feel less insane.

I remember when you first showed up Shade, knew you were awesome from then on.

And well Aguagon, I've liked you since I joined sometime in June 2006.

I'm in a weird mood if you can't tell. It might not help that I'm in class right now with nothing to do.

quote:

To go ultra-hippie for a moment, when two souls reach out and really connect, things like gender and attraction cease to matter.

That's ultra-hippy? I've been living a lie...

(but)

I agree with what has already been said, about having a deep connection. It's obvious you love your friend, but what kind of love is it? There are different kinds, and none of them are wrong, you just have to define which kind it is. You can love someone more than you've ever loved anyone else and still have it not be a sexual situation.

My best guess is that you're gay and have a really amazing friend. To go ultra-hippie for a moment, when two souls reach out and really connect, things like gender and attraction cease to matter. That's just someone special who you can trust to be there for you through the thick and thin, and that's invaluable. If I wasn't a horny twenty-year-old, I would say that's more important than attraction.

But I would imagine it makes sense that this would breed some confusion. We're in a society that's constantly reinforcing that men are attracted to women and women are attracted to men, and you've found a girl that you have a deep connection with and love spending time with. So of course you're attracted to her in that special way...

Except if you really were, I kinda doubt you'd be online questioning it. Sexual attraction is something very different from a deep connection, or even other kinds of attraction. It all comes down to, do you or don't you want to shag this girl? And "I wouldn't mind doing it..." counts as a no.

But I don't know you. You could very well be bi. I personally think we're all at least a little bi. But just going on what I read in your post, you seem to be saying that it's men that really do it for you. So, there's your answer.