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Picture of CelticNewAger
Registered: December 11, 2003
Posts: 9501
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As most of you know, there are mail order bride services in places like South America, the former Soviet Union and the former Soviet States, and Asia.

I was looking around yesterday out of sheer curiosity at these sites. At first I thought it was like a form of slavery or prostitution, to promote yourself and be married to someone you don't neceserally want, but then I thought, these women are in countries where they don't have a lot of money, no insurance, no help form the government, nothing. So maybe marrying American men was their idea of an escape to a better life.

But what also concerned me is that I know for a fact many men from here go to vactions to the Dominican Republic, meet the "woman of their dreams" (a Dominican), they marry here, and then the woman leaves him; she just married to get the US citizenship. So this could just be a ticket to not a good family and a good husband, but to a new country.

I wanted to ask what do you think on these mail order bride services. Is it prostitution? A chance at a better life? Slavery? Is it degrading these women? Anything?


"Regardless, I have always, and will always, succeed."
Picture of ampmaster
Registered: February 22, 2004
Posts: 13981
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it's probaly a scam on all sides when you think about it


"The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, "You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done"."
Picture of geminiangel521
Registered: August 17, 2001
Posts: 6970
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The "brides" live with the man for however many designated years and, after those years are up, her prenuptials kick in: she gets a chunk of his money, property, and US citizenship.

Those foreign chicks take these pathetic American men for a ride.


"We know how cruel the truth often is, and we wonder whether delusion is not more consoling"
Picture of northstar316
Registered: October 06, 2004
Posts: 3372
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it's not like they're forced, it's just like a matchmaker


O of where dost thou hail, Celephanil, Celephanil? Why dost thou wander in Tengelwar great, why on the sea do you sail?
Picture of Paintbucket
Registered: November 30, 2003
Posts: 972
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Well, desperate times call for desperate measures.


"Liberalism is a mental disorder, Republicanism isn't too far behind." - Michael Savage
Picture of bauhaus
Registered: March 09, 2004
Posts: 2913
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my brides kick ***, they do all the house hold work naked! sooo worth the $60 I spent.


-I am the j1zz on your flower- http://www.myspace.com/bauhausbold
Picture of joelux
Registered: November 28, 2004
Posts: 11
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I think I once saw a movie about that a few years ago, with nicole kidman I believe... Can't remember if I liked it...

But I mean who is wanting to find "real" love from one of these sites? Obviously they are trying to take advantage of you in some way...


I've walked upon the water without even getting wet and there's not a thing that I regret I've done everything that's wrong and made it right again I've talked to all my enemies and turned them into friends I've been crucified and resurrected from the dead Do you believe a single word I've said?
Picture of iamastar
Registered: June 22, 2004
Posts: 2343
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I think that if these women didn't want to marry someone to have a better life than they wouldn't. I also think that they are using their heads to gain a better life. Do I think that there should be a law or some kind of protection from it? Possibly if it, sometime in the future, starts to present a problem to America and to these women. But honestly, I think these women are doing this for themselves to come over here to get into America to start a better life.


I have not yet reached my goal, and I am not perfect. But Christ has taken hold of me. So I keep on running and struggling to take hold of the prize. My friends, I don't feel that I have already arrived. But I forget what is behind, and I struggle for wha
Picture of Horselover14
Registered: February 27, 2003
Posts: 2217
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I think it's kinda strange for women in poor countries to do this, for a lot of them I think it is a way of getting out. But then it is kinda like dating services in the US...I dunno. My parents met through an ad my dad put in a magazine...but they're both Americans.


"I know of no safe repository of the ultimate power of society but the people. And if we think them not enlightened enough, the remedy is not to take power from them, but to inform them by education." Thomas Jefferson
Picture of CelticNewAger
Registered: December 11, 2003
Posts: 9501
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quote:
What I found was that the majority of online mail order bride services are hoaxes and scams. They charge you X dollars to get a "catalogue" of eligible women. You pick one or more that you like and you pay X dollars to send the letter to the agency, whom then forwards your mail and returns the responses to you, kind of like a "middle mail man".
The way the scam usually works is that you never get an answer and you just wasted your money, or they start writing back normally to get you to like them, then they talk about some financial hardship to tug at your heartstrings and try to get you to send them hundreds or thousands of dollars, i.e. "my mother is sick" or "I need operation to live". These scams are quite common and quite successful.


Well, as I said, Dominican women here marry Puerto Rican men "in love" with them when they just actually want the US citizenship. So then they divorse him. How evil.

And that's pretty evil too. What if by some miracle the men actually start to like them and they get scammed?

quote:
There are, however, some legitimate organizations where you can meet russian women the same way as above and it's more like online dating here in the USA. One of the ones featured in the article I read was actually started by a former russian mail order bride and she stated that their are alot of intelligent women in russia whom simply aren't meeting good men do to the man/woman ration in russia which is surprisingly unbalanced (I think it's like 2 or 3 women to every man). In russia if you are not married by the time you are in your mid-twenties you have a good chance of never being married, hence some very successful russian women would like an American man.


Yeah, I read on that. Some of them you've to go to Russia.

In Russia marriages occur younger than I expected. Like 18-19 year olds. I made me the math when I saw how young my host parents (well, in my eyes) were and they had two children in their late teens. My parents are older and they've a five year old child also.

quote:
A common misconception is that all of these women are desperate or hate their country, when in fact this is false. Some of them are actually looking for a "mail order american husband" to come to russia. I'll go!


Big Grin Well, make a profile then. Lol.


"Regardless, I have always, and will always, succeed."
Picture of bauhaus
Registered: March 09, 2004
Posts: 2913
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I ordered a couple, so I can share with my friends.


-I am the j1zz on your flower- http://www.myspace.com/bauhausbold
Picture of outspokenme
Registered: March 11, 2002
Posts: 1462
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Okay, first, there's no such thing as indentured (or indenturded) slavery. Indentured servants or slavery. One, after a certain amount of time, you're able to leave. the other, not so much.

And, if these women are doing it out of their own free will, then while it seems a little sad, there's nothing really wrong with it.


The hardest things in life are often the most worthwhile.
Picture of Banshee
Registered: March 19, 2003
Posts: 733
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I'm sorry but this sounds like indenturded slavery.


That might not make any sense but right now I'm too tired to explain it to you or to care .......
Picture of outspokenme
Registered: March 11, 2002
Posts: 1462
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Only one question: Got a link for the mail-order husband? Oh wait, I'm not even old enough to get married. But those Russian basses, yum yum. Razz


The hardest things in life are often the most worthwhile.
Picture of AKSnoopy02
Registered: March 17, 2002
Posts: 23
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The way I see it, it's kind of like indentured servitude but that was sort of outlawed...
Picture of Barkid
Registered: November 22, 2004
Posts: 750
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Celtic:
I actually did some research on this, that is why that one day I joke around about wanting to order you.
What I found was that the majority of online mail order bride services are hoaxes and scams. They charge you X dollars to get a "catalogue" of eligible women. You pick one or more that you like and you pay X dollars to send the letter to the agency, whom then forwards your mail and returns the responses to you, kind of like a "middle mail man".
The way the scam usually works is that you never get an answer and you just wasted your money, or they start writing back normally to get you to like them, then they talk about some financial hardship to tug at your heartstrings and try to get you to send them hundreds or thousands of dollars, i.e. "my mother is sick" or "I need operation to live". These scams are quite common and quite successful.
There are, however, some legitimate organizations where you can meet russian women the same way as above and it's more like online dating here in the USA. One of the ones featured in the article I read was actually started by a former russian mail order bride and she stated that their are alot of intelligent women in russia whom simply aren't meeting good men do to the man/woman ration in russia which is surprisingly unbalanced (I think it's like 2 or 3 women to every man). In russia if you are not married by the time you are in your mid-twenties you have a good chance of never being married, hence some very successful russian women would like an American man.
A common misconception is that all of these women are desperate or hate their country, when in fact this is false. Some of them are actually looking for a "mail order american husband" to come to russia. I'll go!


"Mac, you ever been in love?" - "No, I've been a bartender all my life."
Picture of bauhaus
Registered: March 09, 2004
Posts: 2913
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I think its fine. Here are women who dont want to live their awfull life and try and find a better one here in the US. There are loser guys who want love and thats what they will give these women.


-I am the j1zz on your flower- http://www.myspace.com/bauhausbold
Picture of TwinsFan
Registered: January 25, 2005
Posts: 216
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in my opinion this practice is just a twisted form of human traffiking and prostitution. i know that some of the women "benefit" from this practice but it is still an extremely degrading way for them to get over here. i think these women must be really desperate. Frown


Go Twinkies!
Picture of FreeMarketLover
Registered: June 06, 2004
Posts: 3373
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I don't like it. I haven't arrived at a solid conclusion but I know it feels wrong.


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