Sooo what's the big deal about sex before marriage? As long as you love the person, what's the big issue with it? Someone recently said that their aunt was 48 and a virgin...how the hell do you wait 48 years and still be a virgin? I lost my virginity at 13 and while I do have some regrets about that, I don't regret having sex with my current bf b/c we have sex b/c we love each other...not just for the hell of it. Yes, I am a Christian and all that so I know about the whole abstinence deal but I really don't see why it's pushed so much. Personally I think it's just the churches way of attempting to cut down teen pregnancy rates. Those of you who aren't virgins:What made you do it and do you regret it? Those of you who are:Why are you and do you plan to stay that way?

i don't think we are to young to love.if u have never loved anyone u should not be the one to open your mouth.i lost my virginity to someone i loved and but the person i feel in love with was fake .right now i am not having sex.I am not a virgin but that does not mean i am having sex.it does not mean that i am easy because i was with someone 4 a year and they thought because i was not a virgin i would give it up.that is not the case with me i cherish my body and i know i am worth more than a one night stand.i am catholic and i know all about waiting til marriage.who is to say someone is worth less cause there not a virgin.if someone loves u it does not matter.(anyone who pushes u to have sex will cheat on u)so think twice those who are virgins and do what feels right to u.i do regret it but that experience made me who i am today so how could i take that back

Personally (now) I say abstinence because I am only 16 and now am the father of a 2 month old baby. Granted I love my son to death but it is alot of hard work and is very stressing at times. True the sex was fun at the time but letting your parents down is alot you bascially lose everything. the mother did'nt want him but i did. shes gone livin the high life but you know i wouldnt trade my son for the world. But Im telling you its alot to handle so im saying abstinece.

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But then one night he found my weakness. He said that he would kill himself if I did not. I felt responsible for his life.

I've heard similar stories involving this before.

How do you believe that? I mean, I just don't get it. If someone told me that - even someone I loved - I would never believe them. "If you don't have sex with me, I'll kill myself." I mean does that not sound like a lie? Or anything with "I'll kill myself" on the end. People who are truly suicidal don't say, "If you do/don't do such and such, I'll kill myself."

well, lets just assume that we are dealing with people who are not pathological...


anyway back to normal people and their views on sex with other normal people

I lost mine at age 14. It was not by choice but then again it was. My boyfriend at the time was 18. When we started seeing each other I told him that I was saving myself for marriage. He promised to respect that descion. Well we had been dating 3 months and he changed. He became controling. He did want me to get my permit... or a job... or go anywhere unless he was with me. And he also became very sexual. I stood my ground and said no... But then one night he found my weakness. He said that he would kill himself if I did not. I felt responsible for his life. So I let him do what he wanted to me. This went on for a whole month. I became sick and depressed and I cried all the time, and threw up anything I ate. But I did not break with hime because I felt like I held his life in my hands. I grew to hate him. But stayed with him even though I was killing myself. Finally my family decided we needed to get away for a while and we went to the coast to visit my grandmother. We were gone about two days and he called me crying begging me to come home. I told him I couldn't. So the next day, he just showed up! He followed me 400 miles to the coast. I realized I had to get out. So I called him, after I got home, and broke up with him. I cried and did not eat. I knew any day his parents would call me and tell me that he had killed himself. But that call never came. I am 16 now and he is living several cities away and I never see him. So I am getting better. I see him here and there b/c his parents are still local. And when I do I avoid him. But eventually I will forget it all together. But now I have a boyfriend who has made my life beautiful again and I realize that not all guys are like this. I relationship is wonderful and going in the right direction and even though I am scared I do plan to be with him sexually. So I guess that it is your opinion. I have mine.

Now, I'm not advocating 12-14 year olds to go out and have sex, but a 13 year old girl had sex with a 12 year old boy... and I was listening to fox news and they had the outright balls to call them perverts on national news...

By the way, they are trying to prosecute the 13 year old girl... (and she's pregnant)

Talk about adding insult to injury.

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I think that the younger you are the more you mistake your hormones for love.

True. But all this repressed sexuality (caused by said hormones) needs a release somewhere. Why not sex? So long as it's safe and protected sex, there's nothing wrong with it.

LMAO, Euterpe. That's hilarious.


Girls don't always bleed, it just depends.

You know what's a better gift? A car. You can use that more than once. Nothing says 'I love you' more than a new Lexus in the driveway. Better than blood on the bedsheet anyway, eh?

I'm a virgin and a Christian and because of that I know God believes sex is something that should be shared by a man and a woman who are married. Your virginity is your gift to your spouse. This is all stated by God in the Bible. I also belive that it's something you give to someone you love. I don't know how you love someone enough to give them a gift you'll only be able to give once, when they're so young. I think that the younger you are the more you mistake your hormones for love.

the only possible reason i could find for abstinence is abstinence itself... once you get some expience in the matter you'll f*ck yourself sick if you can =)

Most people that are nxperienced sex-wise have the idea that its something that you have to wait for, find the moment, the person etc... thats crap, it could happen that way for some of you, but when you get down to it its just a pleasure giving animal act that doesen't vary much from one person to the other... teen movies make it all nice and warm and cozy and lovey and sh*t but you'll discover that most of the time its not like that. one other thing, the first time always sucks, thats a rule, remember it, the 2nd, the 3rd and so on are better.

I've come to the conclusion that you can truly justify any decision you make, for the most part. Some are much more difficult and you would have to have a pretty warped psyche to be successful (i.e. murder) but, for the most part, you can always justify your decisions.

I used to be a huge advocate for abstinence. I mean, I didn't force it on others but I highly suggested it, gave reasons for it, etc. And I am still abstinent to this day though, being in an almost 14-month long relationship, it is getting tougher to do so.

Now, to the point: A month or two back, I considered having sex with my boyfriend. I know, I know, everyone is like, "So what?" Well, that was a big deal to me. Before, it was like a definite no. It was not going to happen. But then I actually considered it. I wrote down all the reasons I could think of to not do it...and then I ended up finding a counter-argument for every single one of them.

So I was at a loss. I physically desired to do it. But I didn't want to let my hormones overtake my heart or my logical thinking. So it got to that point one night where he was like, "So are we going to?" And...it just didn't feel right. I couldn't figure out why I told him no because, as I said, I could counter any argument for the "no" side. But I just couldn't do it. But, if I had felt it and I had done it, I don't think I would regret it now.

What I'm trying to say is, if you just follow your gut then it'll turn out the way it is supposed to. Because you can make a list of reasons and try to convince yourself but I promise you that all those reasons can be counteracted. So just wait until you're in that moment with that person and if you feel like you want to do it and you're in the right place at the right time with the right person then...go for it.

the catholic church opposes pre-marital sex, and any form of sex whatsoever(heh) because in pagan cults orgasm was considered one of the many form of comunion with god. the church demonized sex to achieve power, making themselves THE ONLY recognized way to achieve comunion with god... god doesen't exist anyway but not that you would care about that =D

Think for yourself, moocow. Just because the Bible says it's wrong doesn't necessarily make it wrong. If you want to be a virgin until you're married, that's fine. Just don't use the Bible as your reason.

For instance, I will probably stay a virgin until I get married, but only because I don't want to risk having kids before I'm financially secure. There's nothing religious or moral about my decision. I'm a practical man.

Please don't bring the bible into this. I might have to kill you if you keep rambling on about it.

i believe sex is wrong before marraige the reason being it states you should have sexual purity before married in the bible. And if you think its ok to have sex with someone because you love them then if you truly love them then shouldnt you be with them then arent you going to be with them until marriage so why cant you wait thats the best gift you will ever be able to give you marriage partner your abstinence. I found the love of my life and i will wait until we marry because its the gift i will give him. You can find other things to do to show you love someone.

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Originally posted by freedomordeath:
Sex is supposedly an "animal thing" because (supposedly) unlike our mammalian brethren, we, the elite primates known as homo sapiens (wise humans), know how to control our sex drive and do so. Heh heh.

Lol. We sure have come a long way.

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You need to teach it with a reason, which is what Sunday School and other like organizations do, and that's when it succeeds.

That's a pretty good one. I mean, no Christians engage in promiscuous sex, right? And I'm sure you're going to say "Well I meant that those people are less likely to do IT" in which case I laugh all the more heartily. The kids in my school that were most reputable for their sex activities (because they also boasted it) were those that had been raised Christian, went to Sunday School and many continued to go to Church.

Sex is supposedly an "animal thing" because (supposedly) unlike our mammalian brethren, we, the elite primates known as homo sapiens (wise humans), know how to control our sex drive and do so. Heh heh.

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Why is sex veiwed as an "animal" thing?

Because it is an animal thing.