So all of you who say sex isnt important in marriage, but the actual emtional part is what makes the marriage. Im assuming you dont have anything againsnt homosexual marriage.
Above anything else though, I say, do NOT wait until you are married. Can you imagine the embaracement of a divorce on the basis that the sex is bad? If there is no physical connection, the emotional one will fizzil out fairly quickly, so be careful.
I would have to disagree. I think that if you can learn to love someone without the physical, especially since sex is only a small part of marriage, important but still small in that you don't have sex all the time. So if you love them, without sex even being factored in, sex can only add to that love so there isn't going to be divorce based on sex being bad.
When God speaks, reason must be silent. - Martin Luther
I feel that sex is criminally overrated. I've participated in sexual activity once in my entire life with a partner whom I am close to, though it wasn't so AMAZING like people make it out to be.
I don't have much of a drive for sex, though I do not forsee abstinence with myself.
Also, I've got a bunch of opinions to share on this matter:
Regularly having sex and abstinence are both perfectly fine by me, so long as morals aren't involved in the reasoning. There can be good reasons to go either direction of the pendulum, though neither are "virtuous" in any way.
The main thing is that I stress taking responsibility for one's actions and knowing what the **** you're doing before diving into sexual activity. Clear judgment comes into play.
Abstinence can be applied in many practical senses via lack of sexual interest, or if you have a n incurable STD, or if you adamantly want to avoid children.
But lots of sex doesn't carry anything inherently wrong with it, so long as you know the facts. I even find the idea that you have to "love" your sexual partner(s) to be condescending - sex can be romantic, but doesn't necessarily have to be. I pass no judgment on so-called "****s" or "man-whores" if their activity doesn't adversely affect their lives. The ones I do not have much sympathy for are the ones who are stupid at going about it, and unfortunately there are MANY of those people.
Moralization of sex is something I find repugnant. I have no respect for people who preach about "sexual purity" like it's some kind of inherently useful virtue that EVERYBODY needs to follow, regardless of their values. I cannot think of how it is useful in any context other than participating in some status contest with other fools to prove to each other how "pure" they are, and I am scornful of status seekers.
Originally posted by WorthWaitingFor: why would I want to possibly mess that up just so I can have some fleeting pleasure? Sex will never cement a relationship like love does.
I think sex can sometimes crowd or overpower a relationship. Yes, I know you're all going to say, "Well how would you know?" Just from talking to other people. Sex can sometimes hurt the relationship more than help it.
If I'm perfectly happy with my boyfriend without having sex why would I want to possibly mess that up just so I can have some fleeting pleasure? Sex will never cement a relationship like love does.
Belief makes things real/Makes things feel, feel alright/Belief makes things true/Things like you, you and I
Wow, there have been some really interesting responce to a really difficult question. My take is that if and when you feel that another person is deserveing(sp?) enough to share in a part of you that only you have the power to share, then go right ahead. Haveing said that, I understand that it is very easy to be mis-lead by someone under the vail of "love", so the decision requires an enormous amount thought, and consideration on both people's parts. Above anything else though, I say, do NOT wait until you are married. Can you imagine the embaracement of a divorce on the basis that the sex is bad? If there is no physical connection, the emotional one will fizzil out fairly quickly, so be careful.
-Beth
"What He really hates is the shit that gets carried out in his name. Wars. Bigotry. Televangelism." - Rufus (Dogma), regarding God.
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