I'm sure a lot of you have this problem.
You're not the fastest
The best
The prettiest.

We all do it subconciously, but when it goes to far, that's the line we should draw. It can go so far as to you not trying new things, i was invited to a piano thing with this world famour composer philip auburg, everyone played but me. because i convinced myself they were better.

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DId you really need to ask that, i was speaking to krys

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Well since u think that Im such a self centered b*tch I just thought I'd make sure.

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Originally posted by Ohiosweetgirl:
Hydrok, are you talking to me?

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DId you really need to ask that, i was speaking to krys

Ah, I feel so loved.

Hydrok, are you talking to me?

PLease dont debate that quote... it was a half truth half joke, you SHOULD have looked at it, chuckled and walked away


now if you'll excuse me the beer is not making my headache go away yet, i need more

i <3 the quote. but isn't pride and ambition a reason enough to think high of yourself. i mean not an ego trip, when it goes too far the line should definatly be drawn. resisting from new oppurtunities because of intimidation.. suckkss

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Originally posted by Hydrok:

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Originally posted by clpo13:
Being the best is not everything. Sure, I shouldn't be talking because I'm extremely gifted at pretty much whatever I do, but what happens, happens. If I get all A's, cool. If I get a B, oh well, I'll just try harder next time. It's not about what others think, it's what _you_ think. If you go by other people's standards, you'll never be happy. They'll always expect you to do the best possible and if you fail to achieve that, you'll be ridiculed, even if you almost get there. Live up to your own expectations, and you'll succeed.

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And look he's modest as hell too

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Sorry but thats funny! lol

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It's not about what others think, it's what you think. If you go by other people's standards, you'll never be happy. They'll always expect you to do the best possible and if you fail to achieve that, you'll be ridiculed, even if you almost get there. Live up to your own expectations, and you'll succeed.

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That's one of the many points I was trying to make in my original post. A lot of people think that "winners" or "overachievers" strive for perfection because they want to live up to someone else's standards, whether it be their parents' or their teachers' or whatever. Everyone assumes that their parents must breathe down their necks every night to do their homework perfectly. But I don't strive for perfection because of other people (though I guess some would call my parents a bit enthusiastic about the grades thing---it's only because I gave them a reason to be), I do it because it's what I want. If I'm not happy with a 95, people look at me and say, "Why not?" like I'm crazy. To them, that's a fantastic grade. But I don't compare my grades to theirs, I compare them to my own standards. And a 98 always looks better than a 95 in my book (even if a 95 looks good as well).

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Originally posted by clpo13:
Being the best is not everything. Sure, I shouldn't be talking because I'm extremely gifted at pretty much whatever I do, but what happens, happens. If I get all A's, cool. If I get a B, oh well, I'll just try harder next time. It's not about what others think, it's what _you_ think. If you go by other people's standards, you'll never be happy. They'll always expect you to do the best possible and if you fail to achieve that, you'll be ridiculed, even if you almost get there. Live up to your own expectations, and you'll succeed.

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And look he's modest as hell too

Being the best is not everything. Sure, I shouldn't be talking because I'm extremely gifted at pretty much whatever I do, but what happens, happens. If I get all A's, cool. If I get a B, oh well, I'll just try harder next time. It's not about what others think, it's what you think. If you go by other people's standards, you'll never be happy. They'll always expect you to do the best possible and if you fail to achieve that, you'll be ridiculed, even if you almost get there. Live up to your own expectations, and you'll succeed.

Well, yes. They shouldn't take it out on you. That kindof thing bugs me too.

I try to refrain from saying, "I'm smarter," as well because, as you said, grades aren't the only measure of intelligence (and sometimes, they don't even measure intelligence) and because it sounds braggish. I was just trying to make a point in my post. Sorry about that.

And I do understand where they're coming from but I wish they wouldn't take their self-anger out on me. It makes me feel bad about my grades when I should feel happy that I did well.

Well, Worth, you have to understand where they're coming from. Even if it is their fault, they still feel bad especially when it is someone younger. Also, I find it helpful to refrain from saying that I'm smarter than someone else. Grades aren't the only measure of intelegence. But the situation is like identical to my math class.

My whole life I felt that I suppose to live up to my brothers achievements. They were both star football players in high school. The one was the really cool partier guy and the other was the 4.0 student. I was none of those things. I felt alot of preasue throughout high school to amount to the people that they were. I never did. My grades would never be as good as my one brothers, I wasn't a partier like my other brother and I defiantely was no athlete. I tried basketball but had to quit because my mom was busy with my brothers games so I never had a ride. I did softball for a while but my mom only came to a few games. I did join choir and did the musical but that wasn't good enough. I was never good enough for leading roles or any solos. Solo, exactly the way I often felt. My real father decided to abandon me as an infant. I felt that no matter what I chose to do, it would never ever be good enough. I never once felt that my mother was proud of anything that I did or that I even mattered that much to her. I know that she loves me and always will but I just feel that Im a disgrace to the family or something. My brothers dad ( they share the same dad, mine is different) was always there supporting them as well. I never felt support. Ive learned to accept what I cant change and except the differences.

This is probably the most recent event I've experienced relating to this subject:

Last year, I had a boyfriend that didn't care about grades and he often made better grades than me in math and science anyways. I didn't feel "bad" about myself if I got better grades in english because he got better grades than me in science.

But this year, I have a new boyfriend. He's a senior, a member of the National Honors Society, and he's taking two AP classes (both maths). When I first met him, I thought he was really smart. And everyone else thinks he's really smart. The only problem? I'm smarter. I'm a sophomore and I'm smarter.

So we get the first report cards of the year and he had recently had a case of senior-itis (he slacked off tremendously, especially in AP Stats). I show him mine and he immediately says, "Oh my gosh, I don't even want to see it." Now, I had already gone through a whole period and a homeroom period of similar comments. To hear it from my boyfriend (whose own lackluster grades were his own careless fault), someone I really care about, p*ssed me off greatly. I said, "You know this is why I hate it when I get report cards. I don't even want to hear it." Then I just walked off and went to my next class. He felt really bad about it (as I think he should have) and I explained to him why his comment had made me so angry, even though I knew he didn't really mean it.

I told my mom the story and she explained to me that I'll most likely always make better grades than my boyfriends. She said if the guy can't handle it, he's not worth it. Thankfully, this was a one time occurence with my boyfriend. But this just goes to show that I can't even count on the people closest to me to not make those stupid comments.

That would be sad. Im glad I do not feel this way.

And the worst part is when you're happy that others do bad because it means you did better.

There's this one girl that I tend to compete with in my classes... everything. She always seems to come out on top. Everything I do, she does first. At least, it seems that way. Anyway, we were both working on an honors project, and she dropped hers because she said it was too much stress, that her grade had dropped because she was spending too much time on her project instead of the class... And I was so happy. Finally -- something that I'm going to finish that she couldn't.

Then I found out that she had Tourette's, AND ocd, and that it really acts up during the holidays, and vacations, and other times when she's stressed, or really busy. And you know what? I didn't feel bad. I was like: Good, I beat her. And I can't pull up that remorse, and it's terrible!

Worth, yogore, I know how you feel. I do the same to myself.

I hate it. I try try try try try try try and keep on trying, but I'm still only 14th in a class of 209, only a Life Scout, only making a few bucks an hour when I work, never doing something right. But I figure the try try try try try try try try try try try thing will pay off someday.