my friend has been in an abusive home all of her life where her parents only keep her around as a meal ticket from the grandpa. the parents have never been able to hold down a job for more than 2 weeks and haven't ever really tried to. her older sister just moved out at 16 and now she's left all alone. my parents and I don't know what to do because we don't want her in foster care and the grandpa isn't listening to any of us yet. i know i need to do something because i can't have her come over morning after moring with a new bruise and blood shot eyes. she had to go home yesterday after staying at my house for 2 1/2 weeks and left crying. I can't watch that. What should I do? I really need some advice.

go to the police but make ABSOLUTELY sure you have proof. Either that or go to defax. i hate defax but that's because they were bothering me when nothing was wrong. but something is wrong at your friends house so call them. they'll help.

I work on the Relief Staff for a runaway shelter that also provides temporary care to kids 10-17 in abusive situations. I think the best route aside from continuing to try and talk to her grandpa is probably to contact your local Human Services Department. You are a very good friend for caring so much, and very brave for speaking out about it. Best of luck, feel free to P.M. me if you want to talk more.

call the cops, you gotta do something, this girl is going to get REALLY hurt one day.

If possible, go to your school Wellness Center (usually this is a center with a psychologist and nurse, etc.) If not there, go to a school counselor. Do not sit back and watch this continue. If you are skeptical of the counselor, just don't say any names. They can't report anything without a name, as far as I know. Tell the grandfather. Sit him down in his home, with your parents. If she hasn't, the victim needs to sit with him and tell him on her own. If he does not believe her/does not do this, it is a case of neglect as well (the grandfather.) Do not sit back and watch this continue. Go to your Police Department if it is serious enough. Call one of the 1-800 numbers for advice or to report it. Generally, they will have a Social Worker come out and survey the home/parents/child. Make sure your friend tells the entire truth. Do not sit back and watch this continue. Most importantly, make sure your friend knows that she is accepted, loved, wanted in the world. Comfort her when necessary. Let her tell you things. Do not force her to do everything on her own; this will only lead to more problems. Do not sit back and let this continue. If you are not a part of the solution, then you are a part of the problem. Please feel free to post a reply or email me.