Dear Sears, JC Penney, Kohls, and all similar stores,

Would it really be that hard for you to have a simple black turtleneck? I've been shopping online for SIX AND A HALF HOURS and haven't found what I'm looking for. I've found very few stores that sell black turtlenecks, and all of them cost like $350. So start selling black turtlenecks or I will stop shopping at your stores.

Sincerely,
An unsatisfied customer.

Dear C,

I just want you to know that I haven’t forgotten you. Maybe I did some stupid things, and I’m sorry, but I really do miss you. I made something for you – I hope wherever you are, you can see it. I love you so, so much.

Love,
your little sister at heart

Dear Mom,
I am trying my best to take care of you. You keep pushing me away though, and calling my remedies a joke. They are not a joke mom they are well researched, and our doctor supports them. All I want to do is help cure and ease the pain. I wish you could see this.
EAS

Dear D,

No! No, it's not true. I don't believe it for a minute. There are other logical explanations...it can't be that. So write soon...

-M.

Dear Parents,
Why? I am so confused at this moment. You are making everything worse. I wish things were different.

-EAS

Dear Life,

???

-Meg

Dear Pastor Dave;
Just because I'm not physically a guy means I can't participate in the group? Shouldn't you accept everyone?
-E

Dear Birthday Master,

Happy birthday! Yes, you get a whole post dedicated to you.

That is all.

Love, Cocaine AKA Lemony Snicket.

Dear Family,
I wish I could tell you what the real me is thinking. I never get the help I need, because of stupid family pride. Do I have to fill the big shoes my sister is leaving for me. I think I am going to disappoint everyone. I am sorry.
-EAS

Dear her,
WHAT THE **** why do you do this to me? i know you said that you don't want to hurt me again, and you don't want to take that chance, but by saying that you've hurt me again. I... i don't know what to say anymore to you... just that i love you, but don't hurt me like that again.

Sweetiepie20

Dear Life,
Go away. It seems worthless why you chose me.
-EAS

Dear friends,
I think we should all go separate ways. Now that I think about it I think you are using me for entertainment. I hate this so much. I wish you would understand. I guess its too hard to think that I may have a few problems, and my life isn't all that serene. So go away and choke for me after you read this. Yes I do have AIM, and I do have friends besides you guys.

-EAS

Dear You-Know-What,

You know, the way you just sit there really bothers me. I'd rather not have to look at you. This is hard enough as it is. You just make me think about how easy it would be.

-Meg

Dear Universe,
is 1 date really to goddam much to fucking ask for?

-me

Dear Friends,
Layoff. I always forgive you, and help you when it is needed why won't you help me. Stop putting the stupid guilt trip on me, I have been talking to you. I confess I talk to IG more though, but you don't know who she is so back off. You guys don't know the real me I am always pretending to be someone i am not when I am around you, and I am tired.

- EAS

Dear A,

I really am sorry. I know you don't believe me, but I am.

-Meg

Dear customers,
You really suck, here is a list of why.

1. You yell at me.
2. You whisper your order and get mad when asked to repeat it.
3. You change your mind after you have already paid.
4. You tell me this is for dad who is at home...ect. I don't care.
5. You let your children run around, spill their milk, and make loud noises.
6. You don't wait to leave the restaurant to talk about how bad of a employee I am.

-Girl behind the counter

Dear *****,

You are not my friend. I do not want to sit around and gab, I will never call you anything remotely resembling "mom", your son is an antisocial twit, and I would love nothing more than to never have to see you again. There are plenty of men on the planet, why my dad? You are nothing more than a white trash homewrecker, and I know you will ultimately get what you deserve.

Thanks for ruining my life, I'll return the favor if the opportunity ever presents itself. Which reminds me, do you have any idea how easy it would be to e-mail the entire company with one little click, for everyone to find out what you did? It really would be awkward for everyone to know you are sleeping with your married boss. You really ought to be buying my silence...not sitting around trying to figure out how to best tick off my mom, and me in the process.

Just something to think about. I hope the guilt from what you did eats you alive one day.

-Meagan

Dear friend,
Everyone thinks you're a whore. You should really work on that.

-Mia

Dear Nerves,
Settle down everything will be okay!
-EAS