I wrote this a while back and feel that It needa work done to it. All comments are welcome.

LOST IN IT ALL
I want to spread my wings beautifully like the proud butterflies, I want to be one like the sunrise.
Radiantly glowing like a lightening bug, I hope this is true, your not just using me as a rug.
I want you to hold me in your arms tonite, dont let go until we feel the morning light.
Lets snuggle tight and feel each others souls, what we have is special and I hope it forever grows.
Maybe its too soon to hope it forever lasts,but Im sick and tired of love being just a thing in the past.
All is fair in love and war, people get hurt but go back for more.
I dont need anyone that will lie, cheat or steal, but with you I dont worry, because I feel that what we have is real.
I want to get caught up in the commotion, see what life is all about.
They say that love blossoms, so ours is sure to sprout.
Lying here with you I continue to fall, just something about being with you gets me lost in it all.

A POEM TO MY NEPHEWS

From the day that I first heard about the wonderful surprise and the day that I looked into your eyes.

I knew that I would always love you, staring at those eyes that are so blue.

Watching you play and crawl, knowing that soon you will be able to do it all.

You are my life and my world the things that complete me, having the two of you in my life is the and watching you both grow is the greatest thing there is to see.

I love you both so very much, pain and fears, alone I will never let you face such.

I’m only your aunt but you both are so dear, just call my name and I’ll be there no matter how far or near.

UNTITLED AND UNFINISHED.

If today is yesterday's tomorrow and tomorrow is yesterdays today. What is here and now. What do we do with it and how long will it stay?
The time we have is precious and fast. All I can do is reminisence and think of all the time that has passed.
What once was good is now the bad, and what once was laughter has now turned to the sad.
Where has all the time gone and where will it soon go. All these things we talk of happening, we never really know.
Unexpected things, good or bad happen. You make them into the best and everything that is bad, put to rest.
You make the good times better and the rest is just history. Life is nothing but an unsolvable mystery.

CHANGING

While dancing in the snow all seems fine, As I close my eyes I feel the wintery winds and hear their stories as they whimper and whine.

Watching the beautiful flowers begin to blossom and grow,reassures all the wonderful things that life can bestow.

I lie back to enjoy the hot summers air, as it puts me in a world of make believe,it feels ad though I've already been there.

The leafs begin to fall and the light seems to fade, I try to take it all in before winters raid.

As the seasons change so do we, nothing is ever what it seems to be.

Follow your heart and enjoy the beauty that each day brings. appreciate mother nature and Don't be afraid to spread your wings.

Thank you very much I'm gonna go check your out right now.

your poem is very good! the imagery is awesome! read mine!

quote:

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Originally posted by Ikki14Reed:
Honestly, I think you should put the phrases after the comments on the next line.
That's just my preference, though.

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Yeah, I copied and pasted this from my documents. Thats why it turned out that way. Thanks for the suggestion Ikki

Honestly, I think you should put the phrases after the comments on the next line.
That's just my preference, though.

Does anybody have any sort of suggestions for me at all, or any other comments?

Well thank you once again Risika your too kind!

I think it's great. You're welcome.

Thank you all very much for all the kind words I still think that it needs improvement.

Great job Ohio.

I love it. Good Job.

escape to your happy place.

This poem is very pretty and truthful, this could prolly be turned into a song.