Registered: June 24, 2004
Posts: 2
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VirginityThe fear of being nude, Burning in the lava… desire Discovering the beauty of nudity You are not hidden beauty anymore Nudity doesn’t belong only to you any longer It dances with the sounds of lust Feels every sound How it caresses the body Lava, how it flows Like a river You get high You rise high Till the fire of ages Captures your body ……blood You feel the sun swallowing you in his heat You melt away Pain… yet desire Gurgling red rivers Sounds…. that makes the dance go faster Crystal diamonds Lava Explosion sound stops Sailing on the waves Grateful tiredness … towards sleep. A.S.P. 
smile
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Registered: July 07, 2003
Posts: 738
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Use "beauty" and "nudity" less in the third, fourth, and fifth lines. I know you may do that on purpose, but repeating any words that close together can ruin a poem if you're not careful. It was a good read otherwise, if a little disturbing.
-Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem! Caesar si viveret, ad remum dareris!
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Registered: September 19, 2004
Posts: 463
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ooookkkkaayy?
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Registered: January 23, 2004
Posts: 85
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I thought that was kinda tight. 
Im beautiful and nobody can tell me im not! (My conceited moment in life)
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Registered: March 09, 2004
Posts: 2913
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honestly, its not that big of a deal.
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