funny quotes

"He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife."
Douglas Adams

"In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move."
Douglas Adams

"There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened."
Douglas Adams

"Nothing travels faster than the speed of light with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws."
Douglas Adams

"The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair."
Douglas Adams

"We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office."
Aesop

"I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not."
Fran Lebowitz

"The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office."
Robert Frost

"The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work. "
Robert Frost

The world is full of willing people, some willing to work, the rest willing to let them.
Robert Frost

serious quotes
"Am i not destroying my enemies when i make friends of them?"
Abraham Lincoln

"It takes two to make a quarrel, but only one to end it"
Spanish proverb

"You cannot sink someone else's end of the boat and still keep ypur own afloat"
Charles Bower

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines; sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. "
--Mark Twain

"The more clearly we can focus our attention on
the wonders and realities of the universe about us,
the less taste we shall have for destruction."
-- Rachel Carson

I will probably find a million Rachel Carson quotes so prepare yourselves.

quote:

wow, I sound very wise and deep on occasion.

You're an ocean Amp.

And go for the wizard... Jedi's are lame.

quote:

"If you master yourself you can do anything so find out who exactly you are and take control of your existance." -Amp

wow, I sound very wise and deep on occasion. I need a job as a wise old wizard and/or jedi master so I can do that all day and get payed for it in the form of incredible powers

Sometimes you get tempted to make something wonderful, even better. But in doing so, you loose what was so wonderful to begin with.
-Sarah Dessen

quote:

"They Tell you not to harm yourself and then they go and murder the apostrophe like that" My friend Emi.

"If you master yourself you can do anything so find who exactly who you are and take control of your existance." -Amp

"Great spirits have always encountered opposition from mediocre minds"

Albert Einstein

"A woman is like a tea bag - you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water"

Eleanor Roosevelt

"If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun"

Katherine Hepburn

"If you can't convince them, confuse them"

Harry S Truman

"Reality leaves a lot to the imagination"

John Lennon

I'm gonna quote myself again

"No matter what any may say to you, Let no man tell you that a end is an end. An end is merely beginning that has yet to be written."
-Ampmaster

"I have told my sons that they are not under any circumstaces to take part in massacres, and that the news of massacres of enemies is not to fill them with satisfation or glee" Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughter House-Five

“And Lot’s wife, of course, was told not to look back where all those people and all their homes had been. But she did look back, and I love her for that, because it was so human.” Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughter House-Five

"A mistake may mark a man, but admitting a mistake is the mark of a man." - Zak Vora

"but i always say, one's company, two's a crowd, and three's a party"


--Andy Warhol

(again)

"art is what you can get away with"


--Andy Warhol