So I'm close to a mental break down this morning, coming to the conclution that the world we live in is so fucked up that I don't even know how we survive to live in it everyday. Look at the world, with the war, hunger disease, torture, abuse, all this is disgusting, and yet here we are living in the middle of it. You all know just as I know there is nothing we can do about this, there is no way we can help those we suffer, there is no consolation for those who have to face possible death and pain everyday.

I was brought up on the saying "Life is unfair" and fuck, I know it. But that bothers me that we just sit back and accept that, I want life to be fair, I want people to be able to see things from the perspective of those who face hardship everyday. Why? Because maybe then they'd get off their asses and maybe give something up to help these people.

I'm tired of feeling this way, feeling like there is no hope, for me, or the world. I just want things to get better, and I don't know how to, no matter what I try to do to fix things, things never seem to get better, things just keep getting worst. I know I have no control over events, and only the contol over my reaction to the events that I face. But it doesn't make it easy to deal with, I want to sit back and pretend shit doesn't bother me, but sitting here knowing shit, seeing shit, I want things to get better.

What hope do we have... if all we have is this life, and this society to rely on? None from what I can see.

I know that feeling, I know it well. That uncomprehension that wanting to believe that everything is going to be allright...

Towards

Peace, a quiet acquaintance
Known only in passing
One afternoon I look for thee
And there I see
The lone but not aspiring peak

There do the temple walls stand
And round it people turn hand in hand
I am moving towards another land
One of sunflowers dates and sand

Where people talk in warmer tones
And I will walk amongst ancient stones

It is this place that I seek
Atop the lone but not aspiring peak

As I draw near I all but hear
The laughter of those without fear


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I just want to know why? Why can't there be peace. Is it possible?
Sometimes I feel like there's something I'm missing in the world some piece to a puzzle and when I find it everything will make sense.
Stay strong keep heads up guess thats all we can do for the time being.

A-fucking-men.