for about 1/2 a year i have been writing this story i just want some feedback on what you think

The East and the West: The Last War

Prologue

The Year is 2247. Earth is a near wasteland. All of Asia, Europe, Africa, and Australia were wiped out when in the late 2150’s the United Terrorist Front detonated a stolen 10-year-old experimental United States anti-matter bomb. The explosion caused nearly 6.5 billion deaths and left a crater the size of Alaska in the former Russian-Chinese Union zone. It left all countries within the radius uninhabitable due to high radiation and dark matter. If a person came in contact with the dark matter he or she would die instantaneously. This disaster sent a shock wave through the World Federation. Countries began to separate, North America nuked South America in a war, democracy failed and ultimately two kingdoms arose. The West ruled, by Lord Gray Mcillian, occupied Alaska to one half of Texas. The ruler of the East, Lord Norman Plath, controlled from Greenland to Minnesota and to the other half of Texas. Both had massive armies, tons of liquid light for CELR drives and extremely advanced technology. Also both managed retain Anti-matter capabilities, just incase.

Chapter One: How It All Began

At that time of the explosion the world had entered a near golden age. Democracy had spread to the entire world and peace was established throughout the globe thanks to the newly created World Federation. For the first time in history, humanity was united under one government. Science was also at an all time high. Earth’s oil had been depleted earlier than expected forcing the World Federation or WF to solve the problem. Thanks to a coalition of international scientists a new type of engine was developed call CELR. CELR or circular electromagnetic light refiner using advanced filters to create “liquid light”. Now at the heart of every machine was a CELR drive. Interstellar Space Ships were in the early stages of creation using the CELR drive when the bomb hit. Medical advancements allowed for the elimination of all diseases and syndromes. Military technology had also come a long way. Peace Keepers, the World Federation’s vast army, were now armed with lazar assault rifles. Lazars were very potent weapons firing highly charged bolts of heated liquid light. Most of the time the result was instant death. Lazars could also penetrate most armor. Things seemed to be going well for the new earth, but unfortunately a storm was brewing. Although most of the earth’s populous agreed with the newly established government, all did not. Radicals from many former countries including the United States, Britain, Russia, and the Middle East acquired some land, lazar weapons, aircraft, tanks, and began to fight the newly founded administration. After 5 years of fighting it seemed that the United Terrorist Front was on the edge of losing the war. Unfortunately, for the Federation the United Terrorist Front had acquired the anti-matter bomb. In a last ditch attempt to destroy the WF they detonated it, destroying themselves and 6.5 billion others. This caused the break up of the WF. At one point, the entire continent of North America united under the Northern Union. The Northern Union went to war with South America resulting in the complete destruction of South America. After that Democracy failed paving the way to dictatorship in the former Union. Thus, the rise of the new lords began. The people of the west and east were taught to despise each other. Aircraft and soldiers were on constant alert. This is the account of the last battle of humans versus humans, a battle to end all battles. The worst battle in earth’s bloody history. This was a fight for the world and many would die.

Chapter Two: The East

It was Tuesday, July 2nd 2147 9:54 PM. Pilot for the East Lieutenant Major Chris Brown stepped off his F-54 Fire-Hawk after a long day of patrols. The Fire-Hawk is pure fighter/bomber with vertical lift off, cloak, and, if necessary, nuclear capabilities. The F-54 also carried hundreds of rounds of rechargeable Lazar cannons. It could travel at nearly mach 7.5. His fellow pilots greeted him saying “How was your flight time”. “Boring as usually. I want to see some action” Brown replied. “At least your not dead.” added his bomber pilot friend John Baillie. John flew a B-65 Night-Raven which can employed highly explosive forms of liquid light, nuclear or anti-matter bombs. It was very fast though not as fast as a fighter. The B-65 needs a large runway to take off. “Good to see you John” Chris said. “Yeah same to you Chris.” Chris and John had known each other since pilot school. Chris was happy to see his friend and he decided to go to the bar with him. “So how’s life, John?” Chris asked while waiting for his beer. “Well, nothing changed much. Me and the wife are fine, so is our daughter Silvia. I mean my job as a bomber pilot doesn’t give me much action like you fighter pilots but I enjoy it. How are you?” John drank some of his whisky while he waited for Chris’s response. “I’m good. In fact I’m better than good. Me and my girlfriend Kim Jung have been going out a while now and I am gonna propose to her tomorrow tonight!” John responded “Great! I always knew you two were perfect for each other.” “Yeah I know. You always say that.” said Chris. “Well its true….Anyway these are tense times aren’t they?” asked John. “Yeah and we’re on the frontlines if anything happen. It seems all diplomatic channels have been cut to the West.” replied Chris. “Well it is our job to serve the Eastern Empire. Westerns would kill us before they even looked at us.” said John. “True, but…” Chris was suddenly cut off by the blaring of a siren. “Attention all pilots; Get to your aircraft immediately. This is not a drill. The West has invaded with all its ground forces and is also bombing major cities. They have destroyed all our patrols. Get to your aircraft immediately” Before they parted John said “I guess you got what you wanted Chris, some action.”

It was also 9:54 in the barracks a ways from Chris’s base. Major Matt Adams was cleaning his S-4 Lazar sniper rifle with 10X scope when his friend and commanding officer Lieutenant Mark Davis came over to him. Matt stopped cleaning his favorite weapon and said “Good evening Sir”. “It’s ok Matt, no formalities necessary” replied Mark. “Sorry, just used to it I guess.” said Matt. “I have a special mission for you that requires your special talents.” Mark said as he sat down. “Anything for the East!” replied Matt forcefully. “Ok this is gonna be a black ops and if you are captured we will not come to save you. Do you understand?” asked Mark. “Sir Yes Sir” answered Matt. “Now we are gonna place you inside enemy territory with your S-4. You are to take these key generals and officials of the West.” Mark finished as he passed several folders to Matt. “Hum… You want me to take out the entire ruling party including Lord Gray Mcillian. That’s gonna be fairly difficult you know.” responded Matt. “Well, I feel with your expertise in the art of sniping you should do fine.” said Mark. “Alright when do I go?” asked Matt. “Now because Intel has confirmed the West is moments away from invading.” said Mark grimly. “Sir I will accomplish my mission” said Matt proudly. “Good, now go, go, go!” exclaimed Mark. Matt ran to the covert C-140 Drop-Ship on the landing pad. Though Matt didn’t know it at the time that would be the last time he ever saw Mark again.

It was 9:54 on the E.M.S., or Eastern Majesty’s Ship, Dark Wolf. The Dark Wolf was stationed in the Gulf of Mexico. Captain Mike Sanchez was watching lead pilot Major Gary Brooks land his F-51 Ice Dragon on the carrier deck. Mike’s XO, Angelo Bonillo, approached him. “Sir we have got confirmation that the West is going to attack. What do you recommend we do?” ask the young officer. Mike replied “Move our battle group into the area of the former Panama Canal, we will try and cross it. For now get some fighters in the air. I want one group of 8 to scan the area around the battle group. The other 4 to assist the forces near the invasion site.” Angelo responded with a “Sir Yes Sir” and left the bridge. Angelo then went on to make the lead pilot of the assist group Gary Brooks and Lauren Kelly the scan group lead pilot. They were the most talented pilots on the ship and deserved the jobs. “Sir Aircraft groups assembled and briefed. Permission to send them up sir?” Angelo asked his superior. “Permission granted. Tell them to give the West hell!” said Mike commandingly “Yes Sir” replied Angelo. Gary fired up his F-51’s engines. This should be fun, he thought to himself. A green light flashed to his right giving him the signal to go. Gary then screamed off the deck a crushing 450 M.P.H. He circled over head while he waited for his wingers; Corporal Terrance Smith, Major Dan Cruz, and, future wife to Gary; First Class Private Brittney O’Connell. “Lets move out team” ordered Gary. He heard a response of “Yes Sir” from all his wingers. Gary was about to get in to the toughest battle of the human race.

Chris had just boarded his Fire-Hawk at 10:26 P.M. He was to first give cover to the ground forces then to fly cover for the bombers as they went in for a counter-attack. Chris was tense. He knew there was a very good possibly he may never see Kim Jung alive again or he might not return. Chris quickly shook those thoughts out of his mind. Must concentrate on the mission, he said to himself. Just then his co-pilot, 2nd Lieutenant Harman Johnson arrived. “Ready Chris?” he asked. “Let’s wait for our wing-man, Jared Mitchell, and then let’s punch it.” Just as soon as Chris finished his sentence Jared radioed in “Ready to go Sir”. Chris then taxied onto the runway and pushed the throttle to the max. Chris was soon 15,000 feet in the air and climbing. God this is gonna be damn tough, he thought to himself. Soon they pass areas of engagements. Chris couldn’t find the words to describe his emotion he felt to the West. Whole cites completely demolished. “Passing over New El-Paso your home town Chris.” Reported his co-pilot grimly. Chris was in shock. He knew that Kim was dead. The city had been nuked because of its military importance. Chris began to weep. He then to vowed to himself to kill as many Westerns as he could. “Are you ok Chris?” asked Harman cutting into his thoughts of hate. “I’ll be fine.” Chris responded solemnly. Suddenly Harman yelled “Bogey three o’clock”.



Chapter 3: The Beginnings of the Battle

Matt prepared to depart from the C-140. He grabbed his covert ops gear; his S-4 with 10X scope, his GPS which was programmed to locate targets, his high tech camo-gear which made him nearly invisible, some C-5 (an explosive package of Liquid Light capable of destroying most building in a single blast), and his good old Lazar magnum pistol in case things got up-close and personal. “30 seconds to dirt.” yelled the pilot over the com. Ok we’ll start with the highest ranking Generals first, he thought to himself, and then takeout the officials. The officials will be guarded so I have to wait for the right moment. “Five seconds to dirt. Prepare to unload. Good Luck” said the pilot. Matt got off the Drop-Ship as fast and covertly as he could. He got out his camo-gear and powered it up. He started to make the long journey to the West Air Central Command. There he would take out his first target; the 4 Star General Sam Ventrudo.


Gary spoke into his radio “Are there any Friendlies in the air, over?”. No response. “I repeat are there any Friendlies near by or in the air?” asked Gary. “Well it’s about time they sent us some support.” responded someone over the com. “Identify yourself pilot.” ordered Gary. “Lieutenant Major Chris Brown of the Eastern Air Force and yourself?” asked the pilot. “Captain Gary Brooks of the Eastern Navy. Want to join up forces?” asked the Gary. “Sure we could use some help, we’re about to cover some bombers on there way for a counter-attack. Wanna Join up?” asked Chris. Gary thought a moment and replied with an affirmative. “Ok now where are those bombers?” said Chris to himself. Then, a squadron of B-65 Night Ravens materialized out of the clouds. “Good to see our fighter friends are still around” said Brown’s friend John. “Gary, look below you,” Chris said over his radio. “Roger I see them” responded Gary. “. This six man detachment is gonna have to do a lot of work to cover those twelve bombers. Ok I’ll cover the two leading bombers, Jared take the next two, and Gary have your division cover the remaining eight” barked Chris. Chris got a hardy round of “hurrahs” from his allies. “Ok I need an ammo and fuel check” said Chris. “My squad is full and ready for action” Gary responded to Chris. “I’m down a couple of missiles from handling a stray fighter but I’m good.” Chris told everyone. “I’m good with ammo and fuel” Jared informed Chris. “Well, I don’t have to remind what were facing but I will tell you what we lost. Westerners have overrun hundreds of cities, including my hometown, many already were destroyed, and millions have died. Let us not have let them died in vain, let’s hit the West hard and fast. Bombers were gonna hit the West capital, San Francisco and any other major city we meet.” Chris rallied. Chris heard over the comm another round of “hurrahs”.



Chapter Four: The East Lashes Out

Matt crawled up to the building. He then turned on his camo gear. Air Force Command is a powerful tool, Matt thought to himself. Matt laid some C-5 on the side of the building with a remote detonator. After I take out the General, I will blow this place sky high, Matt though. This will be my revenge for the loss of so many westerners. Matt glanced at his GPS. Ok target is on the top floor near the window, perfect, he thought. He positioned himself on top a ridge. Matt opened the lens and powered up the rifle. The thermal camera should find me as soon as I shoot the general, alerting the base of my presence. Even if a few guards make it out to me before I blow the building, I’ll pick them off Matt thought contently. Ok here we go, he thought. Matt got the general in his sights. He then slowed his breathing to lessen movement of the rifle. He flipped of the safety and put his finger on the trigger. Matt squeezed the trigger releasing a deadly bolt. It stuck the General hard and fast. Blood was everywhere. He closed the scope, put the safety on, and detonated the C-5. The site almost looked as if a tactical nuke had hit it nothing remained except for a hole and a few guards racing toward him. He took out his magnum and picked off the remaining guards. That was fun, now on to Army Central Command to take out Robert Michaels, five star general thought Matt. As he walked through the woods, Matt had a strange sense that something was following him. Although when he turned around no one was there, the feeling remained. Suddenly a lazer machine gun opened fire on his position. Matt dove to the ground, turned his camo gear on, and took out his magnum. He scanned the area, but could not see where the blast came from. Then he realized that his enemy must have camo gear on as well. But that can’t be Matt thought, our Intel said the West did not have any such device yet. Another burst of shot came at him but missed. I gotta to do something, he thought, but what?

“Approaching Las Vegas Sir” said Harman to Chris. “Roger, Strike Force move to the highest altitude possible to avoid AA fire and then glass the city completely. Fighters watch for any enemy aircraft. Here we go boys, Hurrah.” said Chris confidently. Chris got an echo of yes sirs back at him. “Nearing Max altitude of 200,000 ft. Open bomb doors, bomber team.” said John Baillie bomber wing commander. “Doors opened” was his response. “Ok one nuke from every bomber should do the job. Ready, Drop Now.” ordered John. Three Minutes later the entire city was light up in mushroom clouds. After the dust cleared, nothing remained. It was almost as if the entire city never existed. All that was left was huge craters in the ground. “Such a pointless loss of life, how did it come to this.” said Chris. Squadron Inbound Sir, Enemy aircraft, P-97 Fire Tigers, I believe.” Said Jared.

Matt was still under heavy fire by the mysterious enemy. He had hid in the heavy cover so that his adversary would have a difficult time hitting him. It worked out very well for Matt. Still it was only a matter of time before his foe would close in on him. Dammit, Matt thought, what am I gonna do. I can’t call in for any allied assistance. Got it, Matt thought with triumph. I’ll set off a few flash-bangs and hope it will temporarily blind him. Then I’ll throw a demolition grenade in that pool of mud over there, Matt thought. This should expose him. Within a few minutes, his plan was ready to be put into action. Matt shielded his eyes and pulled a string attached to the flash-bangs. The area sounding him was instantly light up so bright you could have been on the sun. Matt heard a dud as his enemy fell to the ground in pain. Matt then threw a grenade into the mud. Soaked in mud, Matt got out of the cover, Magnum drawn. He soon spotted his enemy soaked with mud. “For my People” yelled Matt as he squeezed the trigger ending the life of his opponent. He had defeated his enemy but thought to himself sadly, why must so many people die in the name of their country…Why? Even though Matt did not know it at the time this was nothing to the test he would be put against next, one that might led to his own death.

I didn't even get past Chapter 1 and already I sensed Anti-American, pro-World Government propaganda.

Good writing skills, though.

I think it seems kinda long.