I'm 13 and in 8th grade. My 2 BF have started smoking and sometimes, drinking. I'm worried that they are going to hurt themselves. They are hanging around pretty messed up kids, and they're influenced by them. I'm thinking that in like, 11th grade, one day they're gonna show up pregnant or something. Do you guys have any advice? I would really appreciate it. I'm totally lost.

Okay, my ex best friend did the same thing to me when I was in 8th grade. Your best bet is to let her realize her mistakes on her own because she won't listen if it's something she likes. Tell her you don't want her doing it around you. or you could always pull the "choose, me or booze" thing. I did that once and I lost a friend. If the choose something other than you....drop em...they aren't worth it!

Eh, I'm not feeling very sympathetic right now so steel yourself because I'll be completely blunt. It's clear where your friends are headed unless they have some serious spirital lapse sometime soon and decide to go down a different, cleaner road. Why not just ditch them, make new friends and save yourself some hassle. I highly doubt they'll listen to you since they have these new friends of theirs - sounds like they have a whole group of kids influencing them on drugs, etc... vs. you, a single person. You'd be overpowered.

Also, to add to my question (I waited too long to add this): One girl comes from a family where dad died, when she was three, over liqour overdose, and my other BF lives with her grandmother, sister and half sister. Her mom has had about a billion boy friends, and her dad is in jail. You might be wondering why I bother to be their friends, but their kind and also make you happy when you're sad. I would just hate for something bad to happen to them. There would be a huge dent in my life without them.

i agree with purpledog, tell someone if you are really that worried about them. it may seem a little scary at first but it's the right thing to do.

People will say "confront your friends" but I'm not sure that will help. Maybe you could try an intervention type of thing, like getting them to your house and popping in a smoking-awareness video or something corny like that. I don't know, it could help I guess, but they've probably been eharing "smoking causes this disease, and this one, and death" their entire lives. Are ou sure they haven't sunken into this crowd because of persoanl reasons, like feeling out of place, lonely, helpless or depressed? Maybe talking to them about how they've been feeling (without mentioning the bad crowd deal)could help you get an idea of why they're doing what they are, and can help you figure out how to deal with it.

absolutley talk to a guidance coulselor. they will help you and only tell people who you say its okay to tell and its absolutley confidential (they won't even tell your friends it was you if you ask them not to). don't wait to talk to someone. you'r friends may not wait till 11th grade to come in pregnant.

-Charlotte