Registered: June 09, 2003
Posts: 1
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Okay, i'm kinda hoping for some advice. I know this is really long, so feel free to skip around and just get the general idea, but please try to give me some advice! This is some background from a previous post on another website:
- I've known Mike for as long as I can remember, we've never been really close friends, but we have the same group of friends. I've always had some feelings for him, just not really strong. This year I've fallen in love with him. I've never met anyone who even comes close to him, i love him more than i can put into words.
So anyways, to the point of this. I know i should tell him how i feel, that i could be missing out on a wonderful relationship, but i have an unbelievable fear of rejection that has kept me from getting into a relationship. I think if i knew i had a chance with him i wouldn't be so scared of telling him how i feel, but i'm not really sure if he likes me. My feelings for him really started intensifying for him during our school musical back in October and November. We were spending so much time together at musical practice and i fell more and more in love with him each day. He's such a sweetie. He came up behind me at practice while we were waiting offstage for cues and he put his arm around me and i laid my head on his shoulder and we just stood there together for awhile. I wanted so bad to kiss him then, or do something to let him know how much i cared for him, but i restrained myself for fear of scaring him away.
Since the musical, i added him to my msn messenger list and we've talked a lot online. He IM's me just to tell me silly little things, it's so cute. Thursday night, while i was trying to do my math homework at 11 pm, i forgot i'd left my computer online until someone IMed me. It was Mike, just IMing me to tell me goodnight and sweet dreams, even tho i hadn't talked to him at all that night. The "sweet dreams" thing is an inside joke between us, a couple months ago, as we were about to get off to go to bed, he told me "sweet dreams without the S and one E". (in other words, wet dreams) I laughed for a good 5 minutes after that. Ever since then, "sweet dreams" has been his goodbye to me everytime we end one of our late-night convos. Friday morning, as I was walking into school, i didn't realize he was right behind me until he whispered my name in my ear and brought up another one of our inside jokes.
I really love him and i want a relationship with him more than anything, but i'm so scared that i'll get my heart broken. Do you think he likes me, should i take the chance of getting my heart broken?
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Well, some people online have told me to go for it, but being the chicken i am, i still haven't told him i like him. Well, it's time to get a prom date and i wanna go with him so bad, but i'm still chickening out. I don't know how to get up the courage i need. I was beating myself up last night, here's why: As Captain Jack Sparrow said in Pirates of the Caribbean, "If you were waiting for the opportune moment, that was it." Saturday night we had our annual 'Spring Fling' which is a dinner where our two highschool show choirs, high school jazz band, middle school jazz band, and middle school show choir all perform. I was there all day (they had 3 performances) and since Mike is in show choir i saw him a bunch and we talked a little throughout the day. Well, we went to leave at about 9:30 and i had parked behind him, so we got to walk out to our cars together and talk a little. We just talked about the rest of our weekends and such (he has to work tomorrow and then go perform again at a special extra performance we're having). And we were all alone, no one else in sight, but i chickened out again! It was the perfect opportunity to ask him, grrrr... I told him to have fun at work tomorrow and goodbye, and he said thanks and bye and then I got in my car and as i started my car and went to leave he just kept waving goodbye to me until i couldn't see him anymore. When i got home i got online and he got home a couple hours later, at 11 pm or so, and the following convo ensued, Mike is Kramer and I'm the song lyrics that start with (8):
3/27/04 11:08:20 PM Kramer: God Bless the rains down in Africa, God bless the rains down in AHHH AH AH AHHH AH AH AHH <-(he was completing the lyrics to the song that was my name)
3/27/04 11:08:27 PM (8) It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do (8): lol
3/27/04 11:08:46 PM (8) It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do (8): i've got that song stuck in my head and i can't get it out
3/27/04 11:08:51 PM Kramer: lol
3/27/04 11:08:57 PM Kramer: now you've got it in mine
3/27/04 11:09:21 PM (8) It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do (8): cool, i love getting songs stuck in other people's heads, lol
3/27/04 11:09:49 PM Kramer: ha, and nice pic.....I love black cats and the ones that are black brown and gray in stripes
3/27/04 11:10:36 PM (8) It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do (8): yeah, they're so cute, i love cats
3/27/04 11:12:08 PM Kramer: lol
3/27/04 11:12:08 PM Kramer: me too
3/27/04 11:12:58 PM (8) It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do (8): my mom won't let me have any more though, we went through four cats when i was younger, and my mom never let me have another one after the fourth one died
3/27/04 11:13:43 PM Kramer: really, you don't have a cat right now
3/27/04 11:13:44 PM Kramer: ?
3/27/04 11:13:52 PM (8) It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do (8): nope, i wish i did
3/27/04 11:14:25 PM (8) It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do (8): i have a dog, a little chihuahua, but no cat
3/27/04 11:16:53 PM Kramer : kool, but you should get a kitten and raise it to do human-like stuff
3/27/04 11:17:19 PM (8) It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do (8) : lol, that'd be cool
3/27/04 11:19:02 PM Kramer: yeah, like my dad's favorite cat that died in 3rd grade........it used to wake up my dad in the morning and then run and wait for him on the counter in the bathroom, and then watch him shave and stuff, and sometimes it would watch him take a shower.....lol
3/27/04 11:19:31 PM (8) It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do (8): aw, that's so cute, i wish my cats would've been like that
3/27/04 11:20:08 PM Kramer: lol
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That was the first part of our convo, i guess we kinda got distracted by other things, then he talked to me an hour and a half later to say goodnight:
3/28/04 1:04:48 AM Kramer: gnite and sweet dreams
3/28/04 1:05:13 AM (8) It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do (8) : gnite, sweet dreams to you too
3/28/04 1:05:47 AM Kramer: thnx
3/28/04 1:05:52 AM Kramer: I need them
3/28/04 1:05:56 AM (8) It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do (8): lol
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And so that was it. If you're actually still reading this, i envy you cuz i would've already lost patience. Anyways, sunday night i was sitting on my bed trying to do homework at about 11 pm when he IMed me just to tell me goodnight and sweet dreams (again!). Then, today i saw him in the hallway after school. We were going opposite directions and he reached out his hand like he has gonna give me a high-five (but about at waist level) but instead of a high-five we wound up kinda gently touching hands and holding on for just a second, but since we were going opposite directions, we broke apart and continued on our separate ways. So, i guess what i'm writing for is more reassurance, if you think i actually have a chance. And just some ideas on how to ask him to prom and tell him how i feel, time is running out and i need to make a move fast. Sorry for writing so much. Thanks for reading this, hope to hear from you soon.
~Megan~
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