I think that it is piontless that my mother won't let me date 'till I'm 16. 16! What do you think? Does your mom or dad let you date?

From Y1001Gothchick

Umm..well My mom lets me date already but I have to tell her that I am...if I hide it from her she
gets pissed..but my dad has no clue.hehe

I was furious when my parents wouldn't let me have a boyfriend when I was younger, but I am SO THANKFUL for that now.

Think of how much better dating will be when you're older and more trustworthy and can actually drive and go do stuff.

I think 16 is a pretty good age limit. My mom told me I couldn't (or shouldn't) until after college. How would you feel about that?

A lot of times, parents set these limits not because they don't trust you, it's because they don't know or trust the people you want to date. It doesn't matter how well you know the person, but if you parents don't trust this person, a lot of times, they have their reasons and they're right.

I dated this one guy, and after he came over a few times, my mom told me to stop hanging out with him because he wasn't that great of a person (she didn't know we were actually dating). I ended up breaking up with him shortly after that, not because of what she said, but because I felt that we were just going on two different tracks. He wasn't evil or anything, but my mom was right- he didn't have the same goals or drive as I did. Your boyfriend or girlfriend should influence you in a positive way, and if they're not, they're simply holding you back. Usually, parents can see this better than you can.

And plus, if you just want to date because other people are, you want to date for all the wrong reasons.

Here is a good rule. If your parents have really annoying rules and they make you mad, they are right and you are wrong. If parents aren't being annoying and setting rules that make thier kids mad, they are probably not being good parents. You will thank them when you are older and aren't knocked up in 3 months.

although parents may seem like they are totally unreasonable sometimes they are only doing what they feel is best for us. and although i really didnt have restrictions on when i could date and when i couldnt i still had alot of friends that had restrictions on them and i understood it from there point of view and from the parents. we think its un fair and stupid where as the parents are thinking there too young to get into any relationship with the oposite sex just yet im only trying to protect them. and on the commenet about different parents leting there kids date at different ages to other parents its basically about how they were raised and there morals and values they were in stilled with, its not just because there trying to be mean and unfair.. they want to be able to protect there children just as they were protected by there parents while growing up.

No, I was agreeing with you in a sarcastic manner.

quote:

Originally posted by clpo13:
Sure it does. Then you aren't jaded and cold-hearted by the time you marry.

Was that an insult?

Sure it does. Then you aren't jaded and cold-hearted by the time you marry.

Waiting to date wouldn't hurt either.

why not start dating at a younger age? what's it really going to hurt. exactly, nothing. If anything it's going to help them prepare for when they have a real relationship, cause you learn from you're mistakes, so why not learn from the ones you make when you're younger, when they don't matter as much, and can't hurt you as bad. If parents really cared, they'd let there kid learn from there own mistakes, and start making some of there own choices, especially small ones like dating at a young age.

I am in eighth grade, and a ton of kids have started dating. My whole family thinks its insane.

dating isnt practical till atleast 16 (drivers lisence) and some people like me have at least one mormon parent which means no dating until 16 but i dont mind im 17 and the girl im dating is 16 has a car and lisence but i dont

My parents won't let me date until senior year. And that is when they will get me a cell phone, just in case he is a nut-case

my mom doesnt care if i date as long as it doesnt go to some points of extent...

I know how you feel, my mom was driving me crazy being overprotective! I even went so far as to run away once, cause I was so pissed off. Ironically, it was my Aunt who found me, and before she brought me home, she explained something to me that I never thought of before. She said that every parents worst fear is that their child will at the worst die, at the least, end up hurt. Everything they do that seems to hold us back is based on this fear. OK, dating usually doesn't result in death, with a few exceptions: a girl I went to school with since 2nd grade wanted to go out one night with her boyfriend. Her mom said "no". She snuck out of her bedroom window, and met her boyfriend later that night. While they were driving around, a drunk driver hit their car head on, and she was decapitated. An extreme example, I'll admit, but it happened, and I remember my friend every time my mom won't let me go out! Probably your mom understands what will inevitably take place between a boy and a girl who are attracted to one another, and she wants to protect you. Everyone deals with their fears differently. Some parents allow their kids too much freedom, others too little. Just know your mom loves you, that's why she is strict.

wow you really want to win this argument dont you? Sorry i havent logged in awhile so forgot about this anyays. And yes me also. I get to go where i want with friends do stuff yea. But you know what i got into some deep shit once from not listening and i swore never again. So you know im sorry if you havent gone through what i went through and dont really understand why listening to your parents is a good thing. And if i get a computer a iPod a new stereo all from listening wow i might just stick to it.

hehehh. no, vegetarianwithacause, i'm very much allowed to go out anywhere and hang out with my friends and and have a boyfriend. my mum was just 14 when she started seriously dating; i waited 'til i was 17! even though it didn't matter to her or to my dad how old i was.

rape, abuse, peer pressure are beyond our control, but they can be avoided, like by what you assumed was happening to me: caging their kids. but most parents know it's absurd to keep their kids locked in forever, so they allow them their freedom, but all the while advising their kids, watching out for them, bringing them up with the right values. that's parental responsibility.

and no, parents are not in control of their children's sexual activity. look at how many kids lie and fall into worse trouble. and besides, kids don't always go out and get a boyfriend or girlfriend to experiment with their sexuality. most people i know hook up with friends or random strangers, and you and i know this happens more than often. if i were a parent, i'd rather my child be in a relationship with someone she or she cares about than in a random, impulsive sexual moment.

and no, what your parents don't always go, i'm sorry if that's how it is in your household. this doesn't necessarily mean that kids need to rebel, throw tantrums, lie, sneak out to have their way. sometimes all you need is to sit down and talk to your parents. let them know what you are doing, what you feel like, build an open relationship with them. that way, they don't feel you're too immature or too naiive to be given a very strict list of rules to follow. they're aware of who you're growing up to be, how you feel and this leads to trust. it may not work immediately, but it will eventually. it's worked for me, and many people i know. and i come from a far more conservative society than many people here on the boards.

quote:

Originally posted by Paisley:

quote:

and paisley be honest it really wont make you successful when you pregnant.

of course it won't make you successful. but not entirely unsuccessful.

so, having a boyfriend before your parents allow you to date means you're eventually going to get pregnant? ha. well, if parents stop their kids from dating to avoid teenage pregnancies, they might as well stop kids from going out to friends' places, to any parties or concerts, 'cos i mean, their kids could just get raped, abused or influenced into doing drugs, and oh! they just won't end up being successful in high school. tsk tsk.

My goodness paisley do your parents keep you locked in a cage or something. Have you not realized there are some things beyond your control. Being raped and abused or being offered drugs is beyond your control. But choosing the age you daughter or son becomes sexually active. Thats uh in your control. but w/e you kids can rant hold your breath till you pass out..what your parents says...goes.

quote:

and paisley be honest it really wont make you successful when you pregnant.

of course it won't make you successful. but not entirely unsuccessful.

so, having a boyfriend before your parents allow you to date means you're eventually going to get pregnant? ha. well, if parents stop their kids from dating to avoid teenage pregnancies, they might as well stop kids from going out to friends' places, to any parties or concerts, 'cos i mean, their kids could just get raped, abused or influenced into doing drugs, and oh! they just won't end up being successful in high school. tsk tsk.