I think the only reason punishments other than spankings have been deemed ineffective is because parents don't have the stamina to stick to them. If you tell a kid he can't play with his toys for a week as a punishment, you're potentially setting yourself up for a week-long fight. Parents all too often cave in around day two or three, and then the kid learns nothing.

That said, I don't think spanking is always abuse, but I do genuinely believe there is always a better course of action. Where spanking ends and abuse begins is such a gray area that it's best to avoid it entirely.

I'm disturbed you still get spanked at 14.

The only way, I think, spanking/hitting is not abuse is when it happens when you've done nothing wrong.

As to Green, although it's not the best policy, sometimes children need to be hit. That kid who screams for 20 minutes on the grocery line? Putting him or her in a time-out chair will do very little.

I got hit when I did something terrible, and I never did it again. As I've said before, when your kid has a mix of fear, respect, and comfort in you as a parent, they'll (probably) grow up fairly well-adjusted.

I do not approve of spanking, because I don't see the point it it. What is the point? What ever happened to the "time-out chair," counting to three, and "you have to pay for the consequence"-es?