Originally posted by LuthienTinuviel: i still don't think child punishment is valid simply because you're angry. It's only if they really deserve it.
Yeah but when do they really deserve it? To one parent that may mean every time they do something the parent doesn't like(wich could be anything), so that isn't really an answer to me. I honestly think spanking/smacking/etc isn't the solution. My parents never have hit me and if they did now that would change my whole view of them. I'm one of those people who thinks violence is never the solution(ok maybe in extreme cases like self defense, but not with a child).
Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time. - E.B.White
I dont think there can ever be a clear line between discipline and abuse . It depends on the kids temperement also I guess . But there are some forms of punishment or ways of dealing which are very abuse - anything sexual , hitting , tying or closing them up in rooms , excessive yelling , over comparisons ........
My husband yells at my son and just a few days ago he spanked him every 15 seconds for 10 minutes until he loaded up the dishwasher. Because of this my son woke up the next morning and had a bruised bottom. I freaked. Please give me your feed back on this.
I mean come on, today you see kids that really really need it. Most of the misbehaving kids don't get spanked and get a time out. Come on 5 minutes of looking at the wall isn't a punishment. And grounding someone in their room...in their room! come on their's internet access, a ps2, mp3 players, etc. in their rooms.Besides your butt will only hurt for a little while. What's the purpose? It strikes a bit of fear so that the child will remember what kind of punishment they would get if they do something wrong. Besides, the punishment of this society can be crueler. But, if a parent spanks out of anger or because of an issue that could be discussed or when it's effecting the child mentally or physically as in bruising, then it's completely out of line. and ages 10 on up Parents puh-lease put the belt down they're too old for this. That's when the 2 hour lectures come in. And believe me, that's worse.
I think hitting a child is illegal. Well, that's what I heard on the news awhile back. I think it's wrong to hit anyone. People do not deserve to be hit. You do not deserve **** like that from people that can't handle what you're doing. That shows a weakness in people.
I was always smacked with a belt till I got welts, bruses and injuries that bled. I think that was abuse. I do not know what I did that was so wrong. I cried once in awhile, I might of spilled milk. But, that's nothing to get pissed about.
If anyone hits you, tell someone. I do not care if that damn person didn't give you bruises tell someone. It's not right to be hit and I think it's abuse. I got off topic, but that's the way life works. Deal with it.
lol well said. Although i still don't think child punishment is valid simply because you're angry. It's only if they really deserve it. But people like to mess stuff up and twist everything so now no children seem to be in control these days
Very small children require some measure of physical "convincing." A two year old throwing a temper tantrum in the toy store is not going to understand something like money, why greed is bad, or why he can't have everything he wants right when he wants it.
It's unfortunate, but a smack upside the head is often the only way to communicate displeasure to a very small child. You shouldn't beat your kids black and blue, but flicking them in the ear or a swat on the butt isn't going to mentally and physically maim them for life like some of those quacks claim it will.
My parents physically disciplined me, and I don't have any traumatic memories or personality disorders. Hey...wait a second...
Quelle est la difference between Spanking and Smacking? Aren't they the same thing?
Anyway, the belt is definitely abuse, but the occasional smack on the butt usually stops little kids from doing bad things. I mean, have you ever tried to stop a 5-year-old from disobeying you by saying in a sweet voice, "Please Johnny, could you not do that? It's very bad, etc, etc" Completely and utterly impossible. Of course there is a line that shouldn't be crossed, but a little smack does not do that.
I think that parents shouldn't be able to spank thier kids. It teaches the kid that violence solves anything. My parents used to spank me. It never made me "learn a lesson", it made me think that my parents didn't love me (a lie).
abuse is when you physically harm them (i mean like leaving bruises) and when you discipline them simply because you're angry. Discipline is where you put them back in line. LIke when they're having a tantrum in the store you "teke them to the restroom"
I also ahve a question. Concerning abuse and discipline according to my standards, hear this story:
When I was about five we went to this beach. It was too cold to go into the water so we were just hanging out wondering what to do. I saw a playground and told my mum i was going to go play. She said ok, but sadly she -like always- hadn't listened to a word i'd said. I was playing for about half an hour then all of a sudden my dad comes and pulls me off the slide, takes me to the restrooms and spanks me, no explanation, nothing. I asked mum when I got back what the heck that was for. She said I had wandered off witohut telling them where I was going. I HAD told them, and I don't think that getting spanked without explanation would have taught me anything. It's like, I dind't know she wasn't listening to me and I was within sight the whole time so how was i supposed to "know better?" Mum was kinda surprised at my dad.lol He apologized later for mixing me up but I want to know would you think that was sort of abusive-even though he left no bruise or anytihng?
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A two year old throwing a temper tantrum in the toy store is not going to understand something like money, why greed is bad, or why he can't have everything he wants right when he wants it.
