Its a well known religious belief that people should wait until they are married to have sex, but what is your opinion? Should you wait until you are married, or do you think it is okay to go ahead with it if you know you're in love? gibson2204@hotmail.com

I apologise to you all, really I do, but I haven't gone through all (in my defense, there are many) posts here. Please bear with me if I repeat anyone else's argument.

I believe sex before marriage (aside from my religious beliefs) is simply not practical.

You are doing an action that naturally produces children with someone who gives you no commitment and has made no written promise to stay. You shouldn't be with someone who is "afraid" of marriage because if they aren't willing to commit to you alone then they will not commit to you alone, no matter what they say. They have no reason to. (When children come, it will probably be over.) When they are getting some, they will come back... Sure, for more. (especially men, maybe women) But when they decide they don't feel like it or decide to move on, you are nothing to them. If they say otherwise, but don't commit to you, they are contradicting themselves.

Marriage is not expensive nowadays: go to the Justice of the Peace (in the US, at least).

I'm a christian so according to my beliefs you should wait until your married. But according to my own heart I still believe that you should wait until your married. Some people say that is you are in love then it is ok. I don't believe that it's true, because when you wake up in the morning and they've left you lating there then what. What until your married, there is no greater love except the love of Christ.

I don't agree with it. One reason is because God says it's not right, but I understand that many of you won't be so quick to accept that.

When you have sex outside of marriage, it cheapens the whole concept. I think that my body is precious, I'm not going to give it away to the first guy who turns me on, or even the first guy I "fall in love with".

Plus, you always have the risk of pregnancy and STDs.

I want my wedding night to be special, with a guy who hasn't slept with five other girls. That's the bottom line with me.

Well, I believe that you should only have sex with someone if you know that the next morning you will not regret it no matter what happens. When I first had sex a couple of years ago my lover and I made sure we were both really in love. We were then and we still are now.

People dont really know what they are talking about. Well, i dont know really.... its not as if you will go to jail for having premarital sex but for me, i would rather wait than have teen sex before marriage. Think about this, what if you are so totally in love with someone, and you both feel that you are physically ready. And then, somewhere along the way of your relationship, something goes wrong and then you will find yourself in a dangerous and risky situation. Really.... i cant understand how some people think that just because you are falling in love doesnt mean you will have sex. Yeah, having sex with someone means that you have decided that you are physically ready. But are you sure that your relationship as a whole is ready or is it because of being physically ready that you are saying that you are truly in love?
True love waits. As a couple, we cant help but hug and kiss our partners but you should also limit yourselves. Saving sex on your wedding night is not so bad. I think it can actually boost your love for each other knowing both of you have waited for each other on this big moment of your lives.

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Evolution is real, and there is concerete scientific evidence to back that up

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That is true but i do not agree with the theory of Evolution. Evolution with a big e and evolution with a little e are totally different things. Evolution is the theory that the atoms jumped together and formed complex beings over a long period of time while evolution is basically the survival of the fitest and adaption. evolution is an adaption thing so that through time the species will evolve into a species that can survive in the environment that they are placed into. I believe that Evolution is a messed- up theory. I believe this but i am not saying that you have to listen to me or even agree with me. I am just stating my opinion on the matter.

it just depends on how mentally prepapred u are and ur morals...

I feel that if your ready, go ahead and experience having sex before marriage. Even though i have to say i wasnt ready, it just happened, and i regret that very much.
But if you feel the need to wait, i have much respect for you.

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Of course. I have had a few girlfriends in my life, and I am still a proud virgin.

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My mistake. Sorry.

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However, I do believe that marriage is a bigger commitment than sex.

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I believe the same. However- and odd this may sound- I don't believe that you need to have sex in a marriage, or in order to have marriage. As you said, its a legal binding contract. But, I don't believe that a sex life with a future partner would by high on my list of priorities whether or not I'd like to marry them.

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did it ever occur to you that couples might rush into marriage so they can have the sex they would be otherwise denied?

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Going backwards in time a bit...

I actually know people who did rush into marriage. I'm not sure if it will work out yet. But that was just an odd bit of trivial for everyones enjoyment.

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Jesusfreak, so you believe that the world was created in 7 days?

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Going even further back in time to a question that was not even addressed to me. Yay.

I think most Christians believe that the time for God is different for the time of man. It could have taken 100 years on one "day" for all most people believe.

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But if both members of the marriage approach the divorce in a civilized and mature manner, these Divorce Court-ish incidents don't need to happen.

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Back in the right time.

It's unfortunate that the court-ish ones do seem to happen, if not frequently, then often enough that they get in the paper.

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Anyway, you didn't come off sounding preachy at all.

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Halleluiah. Tis a miracle! ^_^

Oh, and on another board you said their were three fanatic religious new people. I can think of two, what was the third one?

I am going back a little, but I jsut remembered what I wanted to say to Jesusfreak, bear with me.

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u think the world created itself? that's contradictory how can something come from nothing..

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If something cannot come from nothing, how did "God" come about?

Ive had sex with girls and they werent even my girlfriends.

You raise some good points, Sanglewood, and I'm sorry if I came off sounding like some sort of fascist anti-Christian nutjob. Really, I've just spent too much time browsing the gay marriage threads and getting disgusted with people using the Bible to justify bigotry. But that is not the case here, and I'll try to remember that.

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That's a little odd. Have you ever had a relationship when you didn't have sex?

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Of course. I have had a few girlfriends in my life, and I am still a proud virgin. I'm a firm believer that you should wait until you are emotionally ready to have sex. However, I do believe that marriage is a bigger commitment than sex. Marriage is a legally binding contract between two people that cannot be easily undone. Therefore, before entering into a marriage, I would like to know the entirety of what I am getting into. I would like to know as absolute much as I can about my wife-to-be, including what my sex life with her will be like.

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Ah. Yes. I think divorce is sad because usually it is preceeded with a lot of pain, arguments and insults. I think that's partially the reason why you should take it slow before you are married and try- key word try- to see if you and your partner will work out. Sometimes I think pre-maritial sex has a kind of guiltiness that could get in the way of a relationship. Although if you feel no remorse then *shrug* it's not my call, now is it? Affairs are a completely different matter. They have a large orange alert sign that will most of the time kill a marriage.

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I think the painfulness of a break-up will be determined by how much the people involved love (or once loved) one another. Marriage is just a long-term relationship that's recognized in the eyes of the law. If two people who love each other realize it can no longer work out between them, it's going to be extremely emotionally taxing whether they're married or not. The only hassle divorce adds is court proceedings, lawyers, etc. But if both members of the marriage approach the divorce in a civilized and mature manner, these Divorce Court-ish incidents don't need to happen.

Anyway, you didn't come off sounding preachy at all.

Unfortunately Aguagon, he isn't new. Although we have been spared of him for almost a year and a half. Now, I don't have anything against god- in fact I strongly believe in the religion that I'm part of- but forcing opinions in a masacred english, and a close-minded I'm-right-your-wrong manner is not the way to go about it. In my experience, preaching usually just gets the other people fed up.

Now, on to being hyprocritical by trying not to preach- I'll probably fail. Sorry.

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In fact, I personally would feel a little odd entering into marriage with a woman whom I had not had sex with.

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That's a little odd. Have you ever had a relationship when you didn't have sex?

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People are being taught, more and more, that divorce is not the end of the world.

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Ah. Yes. I think divorce is sad because usually it is preceeded with a lot of pain, arguments and insults. I think that's partially the reason why you should take it slow before you are married and try- key word try- to see if you and your partner will work out. Sometimes I think pre-maritial sex has a kind of guiltiness that could get in the way of a relationship. Although if you feel no remorse then *shrug* it's not my call, now is it? Affairs are a completely different matter. They have a large orange alert sign that will most of the time kill a marriage.

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Believe me, scientific knowledge is the Bible's worst nightmare. Scientific knowledge and the Bible cannot peacefully co-exist.

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*tilts head* I believe in the bible and in evolution. But if when I really think about it, they don't go together to well do they? Oh well...

I don't believe in premarital sex, hopefully my future partner hasn't had sex, and you lot can do whatever you please. Its definetely not my decision its yours.

Joy! We have a new religious fundamentalist named JesusFreak23 on our hands! Will the fun never end?

Having reviewed this thread, I've seen hardly anything but people like jamaica trying to excercise moral superiority and people like our new little fundie, jf23, claiming that abstinence is the only way based on the absolute word of a God who's existance just can't seem to be proven. Once again, my faith that humanity is making progress has been killed. Thanks a lot, guys.

My stance all goes back to the first reply this thread had, back on June 3, 2003, when the world made sense:

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People should wait until they're ready and can accept all the responsibilities that come along with having sexual intercourse.

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It's really just as simple as that. We have to be ready to accept the ways sex might change our lives. Once we are, though, there's no reason to abstain. In fact, I personally would feel a little odd entering into marriage with a woman whom I had not had sex with. Sex is part of a relationship, and when a person enters into something as permanent as a marriage he or she should know every aspect of what he or she is getting into.

Also, as others have pointed out, if you're not sleeping around, you probably don't have to worry too much about STDs. People have turned STDs into a backing for their own moral or religious beliefs. I'm surprised nobody on this thread has yet proposed the idea that STDs are God's punishment to those who engage in premarital sexual relations, just as those assbags I'd absolutely love to beat the crap out of wave their "AIDS cures f@gs" signs. Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is that in reality, promiscuity often results in STDs, but there's a huge difference between promiscuity and premarital sex.

And now, for my first of many (projected) theological arguments with JesusFreak:

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You people have your morals messed up!

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Remember that "moral superiority" I talked about earlier? If anyone would like to see an example of what I meant, there ya go.

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Why do you think there is such a high divorce rate. People not obeying God's commands. hello, people who move in together or have sex before they are married are more likley to get divorced than those who wait.

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For starters, please don't throw in "hello" at random intervals in your writing. It makes you sound like a valley girl. Now, I pose this question to you: did it ever occur to you that couples might rush into marriage so they can have the sex they would be otherwise denied?

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If you look back to when our parents were younger, the divorce rate is lower. Part of the reason is b/c people had morals and waited to they were married.

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People are being taught, more and more, that divorce is not the end of the world. If you divorce your spouse, you are not a failure as a human being. Unfortunately, it has taken some people a long time to wake up and realize that. You obviously haven't yet, and I fear you never will.

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ya ya its your choice... thats crap

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See, this scares me. If it were up to you, and you had some way of doing so, you would probably patrol America's cities, forcing couples to abstain. It is a personal choice, whether you like it or not. If you can't accept things as simple as that, you're in for a lifetime of frustration.

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You are breaking one of God's commands and I am sure you are thinking well there is no God or something like that. Reply to this post and I will be happy to give you reasons as to why I know God and Jesus exist and why the Bible is true! The only kind of safe sex is no sex! true true!

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And here we have the norahs-style "God exists, I'm right, I know he does, nanner nanner nanner" speech. JF, I urge you to check out some of my other posts in the Spirituality section. Hopefully I'll give you something to at least consider.

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ok well to start off with the Bible, have u ever read it? if u haven't u should

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Yeah, I read it. It was okay. Harry Potter was better.

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I know its true because of things like the Bible has scientific knowlege before its time

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Believe me, scientific knowledge is the Bible's worst nightmare. Scientific knowledge and the Bible cannot peacefully co-exist.

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and how would you explain there isn't a God? u think the world created itself? that's contradictory how can something come from nothing.. evolution is one big contrdictory story.. do u think that if u put all the contents of a watch in a bag and shake it u will get a watch.. NO! and do u thik that if u put nothing in a bag and shake it you will get a watch.. once again.. NO! this would bring me ot the design argument.. i have two premises and a conclusion. 1st premise.. intellegent design needs an intelligent designer.. premise 2: the universe has intellegent design.. therefore(conclusion) the universe has and intelligent designer.. like umm GOD!

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Evolution is real, and there is concerete scientific evidence to back that up. The best you can argue is that evolution falls within creationism, but when you think about it, it's creationism that makes no sense. Maybe something had to create the earth; maybe it was just here. Assuming there is a God, wouldn't it stand to reason that something had to create him, as well? The concept of God is flawed logic. On a sidenote, I suspect that the truth of how we got here is something we cannot even begin to fathom, and I'm pretty sure it has absolutely nothing to do with the morality of premarital sex.

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it is good to know what u believe in order for me to tell u why its wrong

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You'll go far with that attitude in life, kiddo. Really far indeed.

Our science is no illusion. But an illusion it would be to suppose that what science cannot give us we can get elsewhere.

Just give me some facts and I'll think about them. Right now, it really doesn't matter what I believe.

Actually, just answer this:

Right now, I'm not going to tell you my beliefs, but say you needed to convince me there is NO OTHER alternative. Explain
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I will be happy to give you reasons as to why I know God and Jesus exist and why the Bible is true!
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with more reasons and more facts.

ok.. first off God isn't be left out of this because people are asking me questions about him.. evolution doesn't work... so large masses of matter got together and just created the earth... who made the matter.. b/c its doesn't have any intellegence so it couldn't just be there.. someone had ot put it there.. i am not quite sure what u mean by the dinosaurs question.. could u please refrase.. i'm not blaming divorce rates on not believing in God.. Christians get divoced too.. when there is a reason. God gives us reasons in which divorce is ok..so i am not blaming divorce rates on not believing in God.. some of the knowlege before its time.. underwater mountains and springs in the ocean.. the spread of unseen germs and the crucifiction which will open another can of worms..and Jesus was not what you called him...Mary didn't have sex with anyone to get Jesus.. He was placed in Mary's womb.. Jesus' father is God.. and before you all put down the Bible i suggest you read it.. how can u tell me its not true if you have never looked at it or studied it? well not knowing your beliefs kinda doesn't give me a place to start.. and i can give u the facts but that doesn't mean you will believe what i say..it is good to know what u believe in order for me to tell u why its wrong

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Mary was an unwed, teenage mother.

Jesus was a båstard.

God has no jurisdiction over this matter.

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And Mary was also a virgin. Can't accuse her of premarital sex. Also, Jesus is God. He was there in the beginning, so I guess you can call God a *******. I don't know what you gain from it, but God is the only being without parents (therefore no father).