Why is it that Rape almost seems normal? Sexual Abuse is alomost common in teenage girls. I always read about it in my magazines every month there is a sexual abuse victim. I have always sympathised (spelling) with them and it makes me feel horrible that this happens to people.
My friend confinded in me a long time that she was molested. At the time, i diddn't partically know what it was, you know when you're a child your dumb and innocent to those kind of things. But now that i'm old enough to understand im really really outraged. I've only just learnt recently that she was raped, as well. To me, this was .. horrible, i cried for her. To me, it was the worst thing that can happen to a human being. But why is it becoming so common? Is it just me growing up in the world? Is it me just realzing this is life? Is this normal? I asked my step mum and she said that most teenage girls would have been played with before. She said really they have to learn to deal. She wasnt being mean, she was trying to be as honest as possible. How many people do you know that this has happend to? Has it happend to you? How do you deal with it?

i hate the fact it might be almost normal is people..it makes me sick..Please give your opinions on this, i'm very interested in this and i want to know if it's really becoming a problem or im just growing up and learning about the harsh world.

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Originally posted by Shade:
And it's only men who rape.

Not always. Although about 98% those who are raped are women, in few rare cases the women are the rapests.

One of my friends Kaitlyn* was just recently raped. I felt really bad for her but she was very brave and bold about it. She told almost everyone at my church. I pray for her her family and her boyfriend. See the really sick thing about it is that her mom's boyfriend raped her. The good thing is though that he got arrested. When he did get arrested he said " I have no remorse for what I have done" This man is sick and twisted and should get everything that is coming to him. * means her name was changed for her protection.

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if everyone believed it was wrong it would never happen. so some ppl have got to consider it ok. which is sickenign... but still.

And again I say, GET SERIOUS!

People know it is wrong, that is why they sneek to do it, they threaten the child into secrecy, If they thought it was ok and acceptable then why not shout it in the streets? Why not tell the world, why the threats and secrets? They know it is wrong, that is why they hide it.

And for future referance it really helps to be taken seriously on this site if you spell your words correctly. I had to read that post twice to understand what your point was.

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(because cmon, in general terms, unless you're actually told that if a certain thing happens is abuse, you wouldn't consider that to be the case. if you were abused as a child, but somehow was never informed of that fact, or something twisted in your mind (i'm taking this a bit far, sorry) so that you think 'they think it's wrong, but it's so right', then it wouldn't really be considered abuse for them. for all you know, not everyone who is abused knows that what is happening is abuse. if that made any kind of mad illogical sense.
and after all, if you weren't to know it was abuse, or didn't really consider it to be (read lolita by vladimir nabokov, to better understand what i mean), then you're not exactly gonna refrain from doing it to your kids, are you?

i might be misunderstanding hear but it's like w/ really young kids they don't always understand wats going on and if they're not being hurt it's still rape so they could not understand that wats going on is wrong till they're older- thats the kids prospective. the other thing is sex cults consider right like a good thing. i think that is completely sick and it's making me want to puke just thinking about it but she has some logic. to fully understand y something is wrong u must also understand y other believe it is right. if everyone believed it was wrong it would never happen. so some ppl have got to consider it ok. which is sickenign... but still.

eh. ignore what i said.

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(because cmon, in general terms, unless you're actually told that if a certain thing happens is abuse, you wouldn't consider that to be the case.

Seems that you were speaking in "general" terms, at least thats what YOU said.

i'm kind of keeping it to just some people. obviously there are other people who are twisted and don't deserve to have children.

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(because cmon, in general terms, unless you're actually told that if a certain thing happens is abuse, you wouldn't consider that to be the case. if you were abused as a child, but somehow was never informed of that fact, or something twisted in your mind (i'm taking this a bit far, sorry) so that you think 'they think it's wrong, but it's so right', then it wouldn't really be considered abuse for them. for all you know, not everyone who is abused knows that what is happening is abuse. if that made any kind of mad illogical sense.
and after all, if you weren't to know it was abuse, or didn't really consider it to be (read lolita by vladimir nabokov, to better understand what i mean), then you're not exactly gonna refrain from doing it to your kids, are you?

Oh get serious.....

I think that if a mother or father does not know that raping their child is abusive then they dont deserve to be parents.
And if the parents do not consider it abuse then why do they hide it and tell their children to hide it? They obviously know it isnt right otherwise why not tell the world?
And even young children have a concept of what is right and wrong, when I was abused at 9 - 10 years old, I knew it was wrong and I told my mom.

i never said they were justified in doing so. you'd be surprised at how many people don't consider it abuse, when they were in that situation themselves. my friends consider the way my family treats me to be abuse, but like, i don't, simply because i don't think it is. not to mention, being overly controlling and overly protective is not necessarily abuse.
and like, if you were brought up under certain conditions your whole life, and didn't KNOW it was actually abuse (because cmon, in general terms, unless you're actually told that if a certain thing happens is abuse, you wouldn't consider that to be the case. if you were abused as a child, but somehow was never informed of that fact, or something twisted in your mind (i'm taking this a bit far, sorry) so that you think 'they think it's wrong, but it's so right', then it wouldn't really be considered abuse for them. for all you know, not everyone who is abused knows that what is happening is abuse. if that made any kind of mad illogical sense.
and after all, if you weren't to know it was abuse, or didn't really consider it to be (read lolita by vladimir nabokov, to better understand what i mean), then you're not exactly gonna refrain from doing it to your kids, are you?

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also, many of these rapists and child abusers were abused themselves as children.

While some abusers were abused themselves,
it is not excuse to abuse others. As I said I was abused, but I WOULD NEVER even imagine abusing the children I have.
My mom was sexually abused by her uncle, she never abused my brother and I. So it is not a good excuse, "I'll hurt you because someone hurt me" And I think so often they get off eaiser in court if they can prove they were abused too, I think they should be punished more harshly simply because of all people they should know the damaging effects of abuse on a child.

i guess it all comes down to the balance between rights and responsibilities. you also have to imagine, not that long ago, it was considered almost normal for a middle-aged man to marry a girl who was half his age or less. even now, there are places where one could get child prostitutes. re-education is in order.
also, many of these rapists and child abusers were abused themselves as children. perhaps they simply grew up thinking it was the right thing to do? i'm not trying to justify their behaviour, i simply think there is more to the story than the predominant black and white 'he's a rapist so he deserves the worst punishment possible'.
people that molest their own children, too, have a complex relationship with them. on the one hand, the child must know that the relationship is wrong, but Stockholme syndrome of a kind would prevent them from crying out for help. whereas it is easy for others who have not grown up in that kind of complex and somewhat dangerous environment to say that their relationship is perverted and twisted. after all, these fathers still take their children shopping, to amusement parks, etc... the only difference being, they share a bed in the least sociably acceptable way.

It just happens to be more common for it to go that way, women abusers should be punished just as harshly in my opinion, when you get into the details like was the abuse done by a man or woman? you lose sight of whats really important: the child. Abuse is Abuse, no matter who does it.

And it's only men who rape.

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To stop them in the first place you have to change their thinking and they have to be willing to do that. Most people aren't willing to because they live by their feelings without thinking

But the bottom line is if they do take the chance, and lose that part (like in the case of the guy who abused me) I wouldnt have to sit here and wonder if he will ever hurt his children if he ever has any....because he couldnt have any.

Yes abuse will probably still happen, but I doubt it would happen as often and it certainly wouldnt happen twice.
And if the posibility of being castrated scared them enough to keep just ONE man from raping a girl or boy it is worth it.

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Maybe facing the possibility of losing that part of them might make them think twice.

It won't make them think. They'll still do it. Like Jenos said it will just stop them from doing it again.

To stop them in the first place you have to change their thinking and they have to be willing to do that. Most people aren't willing to because they live by their feelings without thinking.

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Kirtan, it is very hard to change the mindset of a rapist. Sure, castration also isn't going to prevent them from doing it, but it prevents them from doing it again, which is what matters.

This is true, I wish someone would put into place a punishment that fits this crime, because unfortunatly most offenders offend again and again....Maybe facing the possibility of losing that part of them might make them think twice.
Because alot of them will trade a year probabtion or even a couple years in prison for doing what the sickos like to do....

Jenos, no big deal.

Kirtan, it is very hard to change the mindset of a rapist. Sure, castration also isn't going to prevent them from doing it, but it prevents them from doing it again, which is what matters.

2glz1boy, my apologies, I read that sentence wrong.

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Ok, so you say castrating them is going too far, but you also fear that they will have children and he will abuse their child?

Jenos if that was directed at me i never said castrating him or any other child molester was wrong, if fact i would like to do it myself when i see the crap on the news....

what i did put in my post was

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so when you say that by killing them or castrating them is going to far because it will just hurt their family and friends, please keep in mind that it is them who first hurt their FAMILY and FRIENDS. most sexual abuse happens within a family.

i dont see anywhere in there that i said catrating them was wrong, i was addressing the statment that invisible girl made. please re-read what i said.

Rapists are people who have been shunned by society and thus they do not care what the consequences of raping an innocent person would be.They have a mind which has been emotionally suppressed for long.Castration will be adequate to stop it? Maybe for sometime a person would fear raping someone but castration isn't a solution.Changing the mindset of this person will definitely help.
Lets make world a better place.