Before I go into detail, I must first admit that I learned a very good lesson today (June 16). After hearing my mom and sister gripe sometimes about him being overbearing and doing odd things, it just goes to show you that our time here on earth is very short, and it's best not to hold grudges or wish anything bad on anyone...and really, it's best to be friends with everyone...settle your disagreements with friendships and a talk over coffee or a beer.

All this fighting on the forum - mainly a result from me - should be diverted away from the hatefulness and selfishness to "okay, I understand your position, but here's another way to look at it..."

I'm not asking for sympathy, but I do ask that people carefully read about what happened...so that who knows, maybe you'll start to see the destruction you or someone else is or has caused to themselves, yourself, or others...

quote:

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My mom found Uncle Mike lying on our front porch chair dead.

He had been living with us for over a year; he'd been having family problems or something, but I was woken up by my mom's hystericalness (if that's not a word, it is now) at exactly 7:07 a.m. Got up, got dressed and went to see what was going on. I didn't go outside, but as I was getting dressed I could hear the medical people and all the sirens blaring (we live close to the Ovilla Fire Department).

Thing is, I was just ...quiet. Disturbingly quiet. Didn't say much except when a police officer asked me a question or three.

I'll tell you why I was quiet, because, well, this isn't my "first rodeo," as my publisher would like to say from time to time.

I found my grandpa dead one day after school. Ritualistically almost, I had gone over there (he lived right next door) everyday after school to pick up his Dallas Morning News (I was getting into journalism at an early age), but that day was like no other. Not only had I found him lying crouched over in the living room, but I had gotten a terrible headache that day. Just an immense amount of pressure throbbing at my head - ah, it was weird.

But I now know why that was. It was like this "sense" that I got ...I say it's spiritually from the Lord, because how else can you explain a not-so-common (at all) headache out of nowhere?

What, with the visions, dreams and conversations I've had with God over the past two years, I know why it happened the way it did. It was like a spiritual sense ...unlike your typical human senses.

Anyway, back to my uncle, yesterday I had gotten a huge headache. I mean, this wasn't a normal headache. I hardly ever get them. I do not get sick anymore because I refuse to let my brain and the devil convince me of it (I'm that confident), so it was odd to have this headache.

And, going through some old photos (I'll show you this pic when I get it scanned) of the Methodist church across the street ...when it snowed heavily last year, also piqued my interest. I was going through the photos last week and came across the church one. Blanketed with snow; the church was white. It's directly across the street from my house. There's not one ounce of sunlight in the photo.

But.

There's this light above the church in the picture. When I scan it, you guys will see what I'm talking about. It's a light above the church. My sister Kimberly thinks it might be something with the flash. I know what it was.

It was an answer to my prayer that our house, family and property be protected always...I believe -- and if I'm wrong God will show me -- that it's either an angel or it's a sign from the Lord that says "I'm protecting all of you."

I dunno, just that picture and the headache and memories of my grandpa three, four years ago...it all just came back to me, like, "Geeze Joey, I'm trying to TELL you something!"

Because this week has been interesting anyway...the deal with Elizabeth and I breaking up for a second time. Just kinda -- but not really -- got to me. I focused more on what happened this morning ...about life in general. About how I had gotten a horrible headache and couldn't figure out why.

If ONLY I would have paid attention and prayed more. I do remember a glimpse of Mike sitting down in the den watching TV before I went to bed. I mean, you see something like that ...then this happens, and you're left wondering, "Does he know that it is His day?"

I'm not sure if we will know when our time is up.

The most memorable "scene" of all ...that I remember...when I was picking up the trash those raccoons got into (my mom had gone out to the front porch and seen that first before finding my uncle laid out), the medics and the firemen ...all of them were paraded around the stretcher, holding IV bottles and doing all that medical stuff while carting him to the ambulance. I caught it out of the corner of my right eye, a glimpse of refuge almost. As if God were saying, again, "I'm protecting you." My uncle told me he had been a preacher, so I was comforted in knowing I'll eventually get to see him again.

But through all of mom's crying and the police questioning and the pumping of my uncle's heart...I had stood in the living room and outside quiet. Just real quiet.

I knew.

God told me in different ways what was going to happen.

Today was the glimpse of life. Another glimpse of life, counting my grandpa's death. If you haven't seen what it's like to be dead...the noise of the medical people pumping your heart, giving you drugs, taking your pulse, then you might not understand much of what I've said. Of course, if you aren't living with the Lord, you probably don't want to understand.

But, one day you're here, sitting in a den watching TV and the next, you're soul is gone.

Either to be with the devil...

...or to be with the Lord.

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http://www.xanga.com/joey75154

Joey I get signs when death comes as well just or when bad things are about to happen to people. I do't get headaches like you but I see whats actually goin to happen but I see seconds of it in dreams. I once had a dream about my boyfriend and then I seen a gun going off and that following day he told me that he was with some of his friends when people began to shot and I told he about me seeing that. And two weeks ago I had one about my uncle in laws nephew and I seen his face then him laying in a backyard I didn't actually know what it meant because we were having a little family gathering in a couple days and then that after none I seen him I talked to him and we talked an everything was ok and then late that night there was a shooting and early the next morning they found him far away on another street from whear the shooting was in the backyard dead he had been shot 6 times. I really didn't unerstand what had happen. I woundered why him cause he's a good person, young and smart. And now he was gone. Then after that I began to listen to God's voice in church cause I go to church everyday and I just didn't get how that happened then in hurch God said to me I tried to tell you but you wouldn't listen. Then that got me thinking my father tells me everyday if its not what I want to hear I don't listen and thats just what I did it wasn't what I wanted to see so i didn't phase me I payed it no mind and all I have to say is you should pay it some attention cause you can help.

when my grandpa passed away my grandma says she felt like she walked into a giant spider web... it was just this sensation she got at the same moment he passed.

he passed in a hospital tho. i think about my other grandpa's death a lot more. that day i had been hanging out with my friends and was comming home late. my dad found me and picked me up... which was weird. he told me he had to go to my grandparent's house because his mom had just called him and told him that his dad had shot himself.

i asked him what he meant by that... like if he was okay or if my grandpa was dead... maybe he had just accidently shot himself in the foot. my dad had to drop me off at home before he could go see his parents.

appearently my grandpa felt that he could no longer live with the breathing problems he had and so had shot himself in the head. my grandmother found him.

thats the part i think about. it's one thing to find a dead loved one... and i'm not trying to play that down, it would be horrendous... but could you imagine finding them in a bloody mess with their brains splattered all over the wall? i wonder about the angle he shot himself at... could you even see his face or was it blown apart? it seems like a sick thing to think about but to this day i dont like watching movies where anyone gets shot, point blank, in the head... it's so strange, such an instantanious, violent and gory death.

Joey, my prayers are with you.

Wow, Joey. I'm sorry for your loss. That was deep. I'm thankful every day for the people that I love. Even the people that I really don't like. We're all here for a reason even though some people make you wonder.

You're post makes me think even more. Sometimes I think to myself what if the little things in my life were different. Even just a little bit. My life might not be as enjoyable as it is to me right now if anything was different. Sometimes things get hard, but you always have to find the good, otherwise what do we have to live for? Appreciate even the smallest things. The brush of a summer wind. Someone's laugh that is infectious. The food in your fridge. Appreciate is because the average life span doesn't give us much time to do so.

Thanks for your story.

That's hardcore.

The Boro Mullisha Commandant

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